Scarred | The Hunger Games

18.

"For the girls, 12 year old Acacia Le." VeVe announces proudly, the small girl basically shaking. If my Otti were ever reaped, she would be acting exactly the same as Acacia. 

"Don't let yourself get attached again. You can't do that to yourself every single year, you have to look after yourself."

I looked to Cecelia standing next to me, who was already looking at me. I had told her of Otti's death a few months earlier, whilst we were visiting Woof. I had sobbed to her for hours whilst I mindlessly mumbled how much I hated Johanna for what she did, how much I hated myself for what I did.

She knew that I wouldn't let the kid die, the girl was too much like my little Otti, too young, too innocent. She knew and I knew, that I would get attached. 

"And for the boys, Orion Gage." The small boy popped out of the 13 year old section. Brunette curls, pale, short. Gage. He had to be Otto's little brother. Otto never told me if he had family, I only ever told him about Otti.

I could see it on Veve's face, the look of defeat, knowing both our tributes were so young, that we wouldn't win again. I could see it on Cecelia's face, I was going to get extremely attached to these kids, and she couldn't do anything but watch when I crumble in the end. 

"Our tributes for the 74th Hunger Games, Acacia Le, and Orion Gage!" 

I start to speak, "Cece, we have to do joint mentoring this year I have to-"

"Look after both kids I know." She smiled ever so lightly at me, shaking her head. "You're so soft and hurt, like a cotton flower. I don't think you'll ever be able to not get attached to tributes."

***

"Alright, so Orion worked in the cotton farm right? And Acacia you worked in peacekeepers' uniforms right?" I analysed, pen in hand, as we watched the reapings. In my peripheral vision, I saw them both nod.

There was a brief moment of silence, before Orion spoke up. "You know me because of Otto, right?"

I look away from my notes about the careers. "No, he never spoke about his family." Two's Cato and Clove will be dangerous, and so would One's Glimmer and Marvel, though they very arrogant. 

"He put in a lot of tessera, for me, mum and dad, and our twin toddler sisters. I just-" He looked down to the fancy pastry on the dishes, obviously not used to flavoured foods. 

I simply nodded, "The Careers are from One and Two, they're quite dangerous so I want you to look out-"

"It's not your fault, you know. We know you tried to protect him. No one from the family blames you. We always hoped for a chance to meet you to thank you for trying." His voice was soft, but a little scratchy, like he wanted to cry. "So... I guess I wanted to say thank you."

Tears welt up in my eyes, the guilt I had buried deep inside me threatening to burst. "And this time, I'll protect you. Both of you kids."

Acacia was quiet, very shy like my Otti. She seemed like she wanted to survive, but knew she wouldn't. "What about Eleven and Twelve?" She asked, her voice so humble and curious.

"Avoid the boy from Eleven, he's strong but has never trained." I note. "Twelve is interesting."

Katniss was very skinny and her eyes seemed almost dull. But I understood her. The way she volunteered for her little sister made me respect her infinitely. Peeta kept glancing around, waiting for someone to save him, glancing at Katniss. Oh there's definitely a play there.

"The girl seems empathetic, I doubt she would kill unless provoked. The boy also seems shy, but he's strong so watch out for that." 

***

"Jester, clowns, that's what they look like!" I complain to Haymitch, looking at my tributes in their ridiculous costumes. The kids were on the chariots, listening to Snow's speech.

"Seriously kiddo, you gotta stop cracking me up, otherwise Snow's gonna have my head." He silently comments back, pulling a flask out of his pocket.

I roll my eyes, taking the flask out of his hand. "Please, you can say that because your kids look fantastic! I mean the whole hand holding thing, you could really play into that." I take a swing of the flask, the whisky scratching my throat.

"Yeah. I think I finally got a good pair this year. Sweetheart has fight, and the baker's boy knows how to work a crowd." He smiles softly. 

I click my fingers at him as Snow finishes his speech, the chariots bringing the kids back. "The star-crossed lovers. Sell them as that." I look at his raised eyebrows. "Don't give me that look Haybitch. These kids could have a chance, all you have to do is give it to them."

***

We all watch the kids train on their first day, trying to see if they follow our advice. I'm sharing a drink with Haybitch as we comment on the kids' choices. 

"I'm glad Orion and Acacia are sticking to survival skills, they don't have any weapon skills, they're from cotton farm and the sewing industry so they would get targeting by the Careers if they were seen fumbling around." I say, popping a cheese cracker in my mouth. 

"But hey, your female tribute is great at making a fire." Haybitch says, tilting his glass to my kid. 

My face contorts, "Peeta just caught the Career's attention." He had thrown a large weight, startling the Careers, and I could see the flash of recognition in their faces. 

He rolls his eyes, "ah, this isn't going to be good."

"Hey Nova." 

My eyes met the smug face of- "Fishfuck! Been a while!" I give him a brief hug. 

"Yeah, haven't heard from you since that obscure phone call." He chuckles. "Anyways, Johanna and I just wanted to ask if you wanted to visit the rooft-"

"No. No, I don't want to see Mason, much less talk to her. You know what? I don't even want to talk about her. How about you tell Haybitch all about Mason? 'Kay? Have fun fishfuck." I don't give him time to respond, patting his shoulder and taking my leave. I could see Johanna, waiting quite a distant away from Finnick, probably expecting an answer from him. 

*** 

"Orion Gage, with a score of 6." 

Orion's gaze falls down, sadness clouding his expressions. I rub his back in reassurance. He had told me that he just demonstrated survival skills, so he didn't have too much to show in terms of weaponry. 

"Acacia Le, with a score of 5."

There's a small hiccup heard from the girl, and I pull her into a hug, whispering comforting words to her. Her small arms found their way around my waist, trying to find a closer comfort. 

How was I going to be able to say goodbye to these kids when they are everything I missed?