Hogwarts: a school of Witchcraft and Love (Tom Marvolo Riddle x F!reader)

Chapter 5-10

Comfortable.

Darkness, peacefulness, the sound of water sloshing around.

All on your own.

A handful of days had passed before you felt ready to leave your room, shock forcing a routine in hopes that the sense of normalcy would bring you back to the present.

Your head wasn't even on the pillow, you weren't even under the blanket. You'd just sort of collapsed on the edge of the bed. Laying there on your side, somewhere between sleep and wakefulness.

Better not to sleep. Sleep was no respite when the nightmares were far worse than four walls.

You were vaguely aware the hours had passed and you hadn't moved, trying to overhear the talking of Prefects changing shifts, but their murmurings were too hard to hear through a stone wall. Your scalp was kind of sore, yet the feeling was far away.

On a scale of one to concussion,
that fact was having trouble registering. The thought that you maybe should do some homework was also pretty low on your list considering there were too many other things on your mind.

The last week had been tiring. You hadn't been up for another complete loss of control experience, but when were you ever in control? You kept it together, even through the complete annihilation of your feelings was directing your every move.

His tone, his demeanor, his appearance, every movement and mannerism perfectly him, but not him. How close was he being to being a different person while looking the same? Were you just going to let him get away with it?

He seemed so made in heaven in the public eye, but behind closed doors...

Your heart burned, but you still didn't move. Too tired. Too far away. Even the hot disgust twisting around when you thought of his actions was far away. Keeping everything at a distance, letting it all slide off, that was the only way you could try not to think about it.

The door creaked open and under the crack of it you could see that someone was coming here. Your roommates? You didn't really care. Too tired.

You passively watched the shadow of two feet block out the strip of green light under the door. You saw the person take a step as if to go back, then step forward. Some shifting. Then the individual knocked twice, gently.

"(Y/N)?" The person said quietly as they cracked the door.

"Will?" You responded. Still too much effort to move though you were curious on how he got here.

"Are you asleep? Are you sick?" You couldn't see his face against the green flame backlight from the hall, but you felt the Ravenclaw's stare at you in worry.

Had it always been this hard to look into Will's eyes? Or where they would be.

You pushed yourself up and raked a hand through your hair. Tried to smile, your lips twisting up into a bitter, unhappy grimace. "No, Will, this is just what we all do when we're tired. Everyone is doing it. It's called 'bedwarming', don't you do it when you study too much since that's all you do?"

Was that too much of a dig at him? You weren't sure. Why don't you just hear him out and be quiet (Y/N)?

Will didn't react, that you could see. He crossed the short length of the shared room to sit next to you on your comforter. For some reason, that made your skin crawl. You had a strong urge to edge away, give yourself more space.

Almost involuntarily, you crossed your arms, as if to create a barrier between yourself and him because you sure as hell hadn't forgotten about what you overheard him say.