Sha'Carri Richardson
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"I'm happy you came to see me, you know I be missing you" my grandma said causing my heart to cry a little
"I be missing you too, you know I love me some you" I said before she chuckled a little, "I got a surprise for you"
"Carri" she said causing me to laugh to myself, "I don't know what you got up your sleeve"
She don't like surprises or taking stuff from me. I never understood why, but it never stopped me from giving.
"Hold on, I'll be back" I said before running off down the hall while snickering to myself
My grandma has done so much for me throughout my entire life. I owe her everything and more, literally.
So, now that God put me in position to give back, that's what I'm gonna do. I love her so much and will do any and everything for her.
I opened my duffle bag before pulling out the stack of money. My heart dropped before I unintentionally swallowed harshly.
Jesus.
I took a deep breath before making my way out the room. As I made my way back down the hall, I put the money behind my back.
"Carri, I'm not playing" she said as I brushed her off, "Whatever you got behind your back, I want you to take it back"
"No grandma listen, I know you don't like me giving you stuff but I have to. I just want you to know how much I love and appreciate you. You really superwoman in my eyes.."
I finished up with what I had to say before revealing the money. She just looked at me speechless before breaking down into tears.
"Carri I can't take that" she said while shaking her head and fanning me away, "Take it back"
"I want you to have it, it's yours"
"No" she refused while wiping her face before I sat the money on her lap and just hugged her
"I'm not accepting no, you deserve it. It's yours, all yours"
"You need that money"
"Grandma if I needed it I would keep it. You don't have to take care of me no more, it's my job to take care of you now"
We had our moment before she eventually just accepted it. I have all day, we could've went back and forth about this.
"Thank you, baby" she said before kissing my cheek, "I really really do appreciate you, you don't understand how much of a blessing you are"
"You're welcome, you don't have to do for me no more. I got you now"
My grandma raised me, my mom was around but only for emotional support. I love her dearly, but most credits go to my grandma.
If anything was to ever happen to my grandma, I wouldn't be able to function.
I stayed for a little longer before leaving. Time is flying and I'm getting tired.
I unlocked the door to my apartment before entering. I'm so happy that I'm home, I love being home.
I immediately found my way to my room before dropping everything. I then headed to the bathroom and jumped in the shower.
The shower last for a long relaxing thirty minutes before I got out. As I dried off, I was interrupted by somebody knocking on the door.
"Who is that?" I asked myself while making my way to the door
I look through the peep whole before seeing Jermaine. Without any hesitation, I opened it with a quickness.
"Hey" I said while trying to hug him before getting pushed back
"Don't hug me, and why you answering the door with just a towel on?" he said while walking in as I closed and locked the door
"You wanted me to let you keep knocking?"
"Tone" he said causing me to mug him
"If you gone come in here in a bad mood then just go, like for real. Nobody did shit to you, Jermaine"
I followed him back to my room and just watched as he laid across my bed.
"Who you had in here?"
"Why would I have somebody in here?"
"Cause you got hoeish ways, now tell me what bum ass niggas you had here" I just stood there looking at him in disbelief
I'm not even surprised for real, but it still caught me off guard.
"Nobody was here"
"So who hat that is?" he pointed at the hat that sat at the end of the bed
"It's my hat"
"You a hoe, and you wonder why I do what I do" he said and I stepped closer before he sat up and I backed up, "Yeah, back up"
"I wonder why you do what you do because i've been nothing but good to you. I'm not no hoe, how many times I gotta prove myself?"
"Until I feel like you don't need to no more. You keep showing me these red flags"
What red flags?
I'm so good to this man, he's the problem. I've never cheated on him or anything, it's all him.
"And you want me to be loyal to you while you do what you wanna"
"You gone do it too cause you just dumb as hell. Sha'Carri you weak, you a weak female" he spat out before laughing
I'm so upset that the love that I have for this man is causing me to overlook everything. He's right I am weak and dumb.
My heart begin to get heavy before I just started crying. I don't know what else to do, so I'm just gonna cry.
"Can you just leave?" I asked respectfully before he laid back down comfortably, "I'm not playing"
"I ain't going nowhere, and I'm spending the night here" he said causing me to grab and pull him up
He stood up and grabbed me making sure to hold a tight grip around my neck.
"Let me go" I managed to get out as the grip got tighter and I tried grabbing his hand
"Don't ever put your hands on me, girl. The fuck is wrong with your stupid ass?"
He let me go before pushing me back as I just stood there stuck. This isn't his first time putting his hands on me, it's more like his thousandth.
I'm use to it.
He's done worse, it depends on what I did or said.
"You told me that you loved me, and I believed that shit" I asked as a tear rolled down my face, "You don't love me if you putting your hands on me"
"I do love you, I'm just not in love with you no more. Now, put on your clothes and come lay down"
He's confusing me.
I just quietly went over to my dresser and pulled out my clothes. I moisturized my body before actually getting in the bed.
He just ruined my whole vibe and I blame me. I let him do it, and I let him do it every time. I'm at the point where I don't know what to do with him.
It's like my heart and mind is at war, and my heart is definitely winning.
