.·:*¨༺ ༻¨*:·.
The coffin is lowered into the ground. Elspeth cries into Sir James' shoulder. Lexi is stony faced. Venetia tranquilized into oblivion. Even during the service, she had not once looked at him. After all, she had not spoken to him since the day of the party which, although just four days ago felt like an eternity to him.
Oliver follows the family out of the graveyard. Sir James turns and puts his hand on Oliver's shoulder firmly.
"See you back at the house, Oliver." He said simply, sending the boy a tight smile as he turned back to his family.
The Catton's walk on ahead, leaving Oliver behind with the rest of the mourners. Oliver watched as Alexandra walked beside her family and yet so very fair away. It was as though Felix was her main tie to her family, other than the blood they shared. Without her twin, she had been left adrift in this world.
Oliver hoped to be her anchor.
Sir James, Elspeth, Alexandra and Venetia stand on a bridge over a little stream. Duncan holds dark umbrellas over their heads so the rain doesn't ruin the pure elegance of their mourning clothes.
Alexandra is the one holding the stone with Felix's name engraved onto it. She can't let go of it. Gently, Sir James takes it from her. And throws it into the water.
Oliver, hidden in the opposite bank by the foliage, watches as the stone hits the water.
He stayed, even after the Catton's left, for after they did he realised that Alexandra still had not moved and no one had waited for her. She merely stood at the edge of the bridge and for a moment, Oliver wondered whether she was going to throw herself in after her brother.
Oliver thought to himself, watching this girl who was now all alone in the world, if you have a brother who dies, do you stop saying you have one? Or will she always be a sister, a twin, even when the other half of the equation is gone?
He watched her as she pushed off of the stone railing and began to walk the opposite way of where her family had gone. She was making her way back to the grave.
.·:*¨༺ ༻¨*:·.
By the time he reached Felix's freshly dug grave, Alexandra was already beside it having collapsed to her knees as she wept angry tears. He was sure that if he had arrived but a few moments later, he might've have discovered her clawing at the soil in some desperate attempt to bring him back.
Oliver walked up behind her, hopefully making his presence known as he knelt down behind the girl with his hands on her shoulders. He nuzzled his head into her neck, hiding his face in her soft hair as he felt her sobs wracking through her body.
"Why did he leave me, Oliver." She asked through her tears, not taking her eyes off of the gravestone. "What did I do wrong?"
"I don't know, darling."
"He always said he'd never leave me." She whimpered, the sound nearly shattering Oliver's heart if he had one. "He promised he would never leave me. He swore."
Oliver pressed a kiss to her neck, the most tender part of her. If he wanted, he could bite down on her throat and have her join her brother but he decided not to. Was that not what love is?
"I will never leave you, I can promise you that." Oliver hummed but Alexandra merely scoffed. "As much as I love some of those little sounds you make, use your words darling."
"Everyone leaves, Ollie." She said quietly. "No one can escape the fate of God."
Oliver wanted to laugh at that. Scream and shake her, I am god, I am god, I am god. But he didn't. He assumed she would not have appreciated that.
"I would never let anything as simple as death take me from you." Oliver said, turning her to face him and brushing a limp curl of her golden hair out of her face, adopting a teasing tone with his next words. "You'll never be able to escape me."
She laughed softly at that, the very first time she had felt anything other than grief and loneliness this past few days and she was grateful for it as she leant her head into his chest and he caged her in his arms, letting her cry. Letting himself cry for a moment. For what they had both lost.
.·:*¨༺ ༻¨*:·.
They were all sat in the library like that very first day, though with Alexandra there rather than Felix. Their shoes were all kicked off although still in black and as elegant as ever while Venetia chain smoked.
Lexi sat on the floor, her long black dress covering her legs as she pulled them up to cradle them at her chest as she stared at the carpet below her. In her eyes shone the sweetness of melancholy, the inexpressible tenderness of her heart shining through in her gaze.
"The vicar did well." Sir James said, breaking the tense silence as Elspbeth looked up quickly. Always desperate for a distraction.
"Yes." Elspbeth said with a small smile. "So much nicer than his father."
The small talk is agonizing, but it's the only thing keeping them afloat.
"Oh he was alright. Just a little old fashioned."
"Extremely old fashioned! Do you remember Felix's Christening?" Elspbeth exclaimed. ""You can't possibly have River as a middle name!" Do you remember?"
"I remember you giving him what for." Sir James said with a chuckle. "Especially after admitting Lexi's middle name would be Phoenix."
"Doesn't matter now." Elspbeth said, drifting briefly into reality. "Doesn't matter what his middle name is now."
"Darling..." Sir James began but Elspbeth just continued to talk.
"He was right. River is quite silly. But I suppose you don't pick your child's name imagining one day you'll have to think about what it will look like carved on a headstone. Choose a font..." She said, petering out, her toes touching the abyss, if she falls in she'll never get out.
"What font did you choose?" Oliver asked quickly to save Elspbeth from such a spiral. Lexi was grateful for that.
"Times New Roman. On local stone." She said with a small swallow. "It'll be good I think."
"Yeah. Yeah. It's a good choice. Solid." Oliver said simply as Venetia laughed scornfully. That seemed to knock some sort of sense into Oliver as he stood immediately. "I'll leave you."
"You're not going anywhere, Oliver darling?" Elspebeth said immediately, looking down at her daughter who had also lifted her head.
"I...was just going upstairs."
"You're not leaving Saltburn though, are you?" Lexi asked, her eyes wide and shining like a doe in a way that made Oliver's heart (and trousers) strain.
Oliver shook his head before glancing over at Venetia and Sir James, catching the tail end of a look between them. He was not to be welcomed by half of the room, it seemed.
.·:*¨༺ ༻¨*:·.
