After Journeys End: A Royai Fanfiction

Nightmares

Hi! I wanna say thank you so much! I know no one will probably care but I'm really happy for getting 1.5K reads! 

Alright, alright, on with the chapter. Sorry it's super short, but it's fluffy and everyone loves fluffy :)

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Roy's P.O.V.

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Snap!

The house exploded into flames, the screams growing louder, and then fading. 

I waved the soldiers behind me to check for survivors, before moving on the next house. 

And that was my routine. Snap. Boom. Wave. Leave. Snap. Boom. Wave. Leave. I couldn't count the number of times that happened, even if I'd tried. I remained a robot, taking lives and moving on. 

All the lives, the screaming, burning, lives, what could have been, what never would be, the burning-burning-the death, destruction, fire, all the fire! 

I sat up, breathing hard. I looked around myself and saw that I was still in the room given to me temporarily in East City Headquarters. Not in Ishval, not slaughtering countless innocent human beings. I wiped some tears from my eyes. 

I wiped my forehead and stood up, noticing it was still dark outside, so I threw on a shirt and crept out into the hallway, before silently sneaking into Riza's room and locking the door behind me. 

Don't get the wrong idea, I wasn't doing anything out of the ordinary. Occasionally, Riza or I would get nightmares from our time in Ishval, and we'd go to the other's apartment. Riza was the only one who understood the demons that haunted me, and vice versa. Sometimes, we'd even stay the night, just because we needed to be with someone else. 

I walked across the small room to her sleeping form on the cot, still holding back tears. I laid my hand on her arm, and immediately her eyes shot open and she sat up, whipping her gun from beneath her mattress and aiming it at me in two seconds flat. I was unfazed, as this was normal. She sighed and laid her gun back down, her expression softening. 

"You really shouldn't be here, Roy," she said, pulling me down to sit next to her on the small bed. "What's wrong?" 

I looked down. "I'm a monster." 

She, of course, knew what I was talking about immediately. "You and me both." 

I chuckled dryly and looked over at her. I whispered, "We had no choice, I know. But I'm a monster. I killed so many innocents..." a tear slid down my face. 

Riza grabbed my hand and held my face up. "All that we've worked for, all that we're doing to help rebuild Ishval...I know for certain that I will never feel my sins have been atoned for, but we can at least try to look forward, and help the descendants of those we have hurt." She pulled me into a hug. "I will never forgive myself for killing thousands, but that will not stop me from helping you achieve your goals and aiding in the salvation of Ishval. If we quit now, we'll never feel any less guilty, and we'll never help any more people." 

I tightened my arms around her and took a shaky breath. 

"I don't deserve you," I whispered. 

She let out a breath that sounded like a laugh. "Who else is there for two monsters like us?" 

I pulled back and let a sad smirk tug on my mouth. "Even now, after everything, nothing has really changed, has it?" 

She shook her head. "Still the same people with the same history." 

Riza understood me. That was part of the reason why I loved her so much. We had a shared pain from fighting-no, from massacring-in the Ishvalan "War." We fought the same personal demons, sometimes together. Riza was my confidante about all my pain, as I was hers. I knew how she killed less people than me, except it was harder for her because you can only shoot one person at a time. With my alchemy, I could blow up a building full of people and feel much less remorse. Snipers feel the guilt on a higher level. 

I put my hand on her face and leaned in to kiss her, to chase away all the bad thoughts about what we did, to comfort her and not let her think about our actions. The kiss turned rough quickly, however, and I had to pull away to restrain myself. I leaned my head on hers, like on the train, and whispered, "I should go." 

She nodded. "It's getting lighter. Can't have anyone see you escaping my room." 

I stood up and ruffled her hair. 

"See you in the morning, Lieutenant General Hawkeye." 

"Until then, General Mustang." 

I closed my eyes and smiled, leaving her room to go to mine. 

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Yeah I'm horrible

I'm sorry! This was more or less filler because all the exciting things can't happen just yet :)

Thank you so much for sticking with me!

Don't forget to remind me to update! I'm good at forgetting

Signing off

-IngeniumVatum