Secrets 3

Chapter 7

Louis' POV 

I enjoyed last night with Allison. We didn't really do anything though. It was the first night since the wedding we haven't had sex. I don't mind though. Us having sex isn't just about me. It's about her. I'm not going to force her into anything. I've never done that. I won't start that now. I can't see myself doing that. 

Well I guess there was one time I kind of forced her but I couldn't help it. I wasn't myself that night. I remember us starting off slow like we usually do but then I started thinking like I used to and I couldn't stop. I never want to do that to her again even though she wasn't upset about it. I probably won't. Maybe it was just a one time thing. She seems to think it was. It does make sense. I never had that happen except for then. I don't really want to think about it anymore. Every time I do it just upsets me like it did the day after.

I woke up to my alarm going off. I turned it off before looking down at Allison. She moved a little, cuddling closer to me. She deserves to sleep. I don't want to wake her up. I started to move out of bed when she tightened her arms around me, "Don't leave."

It's kind of upsetting hearing her say that. I have a hard enough time having to go to work without her. I hate knowing the fact that when I leave she's here alone. I tightened my arms around her and lightly kissed her head. I can tell she probably doesn't feel good. She's usually like this when she doesn't. When she's like this I just want to stay home with her. She probably won't let me though.

I moved one of my hands down and started running my finger tips up and down her back. I know she loves it when I do this. She used to ask me to do it all the time now I just know to. I just want to make this better for her. It sucks knowing that I can't. 

We laid there for awhile. I know I need to call in or get up. I kissed the top of her head before moving over to grab my phone. She started moving in my arms again. She looked up at me, "What are you doing?"

"Calling in."

 She shook her head, "Don't. You should go to work."

"Are you sure?"

She nodded, "I just wanted to cuddle."

I pecked her lips before moving out from under her. I would rather call in and spend that day with her. I know I can do that as soon as I get home. I just don't want to wait till then. I know Allison won't let me though. She wants me to go to work. I mean if I quit I don't know what she would do. We would be financially fine. I don't think she cares though. 

I finished getting ready and walked back into our bedroom. I noticed that she wasn't looking at me like she usually is when I walk in. She might have went back to sleep already. I wouldn't doubt it. She does love her sleep. I walked over to grab my phone off the nightstand when I saw her eyes closed as she was cuddled up to my pillow. It's cute how she does that when I'm not here or in bed with her. I moved some of her hair and left a light kiss on her lips before I walked out. I don't want to wake her up just to kiss her bye. I want to but she deserves to sleep. She's done a lot the past few days. Especially since we got back. 

I looked at the clock on my car as I pulled into the parking lot. I noticed that there's about 5 minutes before the bell rings. I'm a little late but I don't care. I would rather spend my mornings than come here. I love my job. I just don't like the fact that Lindsey is my student teacher. Maybe it wouldn't be as hard to leave Allison in the mornings if she wasn't here. 

I walked down the hall to my classroom. My door was already open. I sighed. I know she's already here. I just need to get today over with. I walked in and saw her sitting in the chair she usually sits in, playing on her phone. At least she's not bothering me. I walked over to my desk and set down my bag. She looked up and smile. I shook my head. I really don't want to deal with her today. She's going to be just like Lauren. I can already tell. Lauren fucking drove me crazy. That's because she's crazy and didn't understand that I don't want to be with her. I don't want anyone else other than Allison. She's my beautiful wife and I wouldn't trade her for anyone else. She's everything to me. I mumbled, "Do you need something."