out of the blue | george clarkey

42; a good one is on the way so just hang on

today i was going on saving grace again to do an updated episode and to break down my album. i wanted to do the big breakdown interview with someone i was comfortable with and of course that was grace. i also knew she would make the situation light hearted and not as traumatic as it could've been.

"helllo and welcome back to saving grace, today we're joined by the international superstar that is elena elmslie" she claps and so does george and grace's producer behind the camera. "wow, thanks guys quite the intro" i laugh. "now, your album is finally out! that is so exciting, how are you feeling?" grace asks. "mental, i mean it's been about a week now and my label keep trying to tell me all the records it's broken and how it's doing but i just choose to turn a blind eye i can't lie" i say. "i don't blame you, it's quite stressful being successful isn't it" she says sarcastically and joking tucking her hair behind her ear smirking. "exactly, god my life's so hard!" i joke back. 

"okay, now we need to break down this album. it has been on repeattt!" grace says. "god i need a drink" i say taking a sip of the vodka cranberry grace kindly poured me. "well i know, strap in guys!" 

"so, is this album in chronological order, i heard?" grace asks. "yeah, so i tried to make it follow the story from me breaking up with my god awful ex to then meeting the even worse george clarke" i say pointing to him behind the camera. "of course, the worst!" grace says joining my sarcasm. "so, the first couple tracks; vampire, enough for you and body better are about your ex?" grace questions. "yes" i say mocking a gag. "okay, steady on emetophobe here" she jokes, making burst out laughing. "yeah, they're all just kind of about not feeling good enough, you know all the sad girl shit you feel after a breakup" i explain. "alllll the sad girl shit and i love it, i was literally crying to 'enough for you' the first time i heard it" grace tells me. "babe! yeah, that's a sad one probably one of the hardest to write". "you say in the song, 'and some day i'll be everything to somebody else' do you think you've got that now?" she asks me. "ahhh, i hope so! i think so! no, definitely george is the best, truly and i think he thinks that" i say pulling a face, scared to look at him. "he definitely does, i've seen the way he looks at you" grace says making me smile. "then you go into 'pretty isn't pretty'" grace continues. "yeah that one doesn't really fit into the narrative but i kind of just wrote it about my frustrations with the industry and society. like whilst the whole drama with my ex happened, i was ripped apart by the media and i was a lot you know. i think the press are way too hard on all of us but women in particular" i explain. "oh for sure, i mean they think i'm a man!" grace says. "they're fucking ass holes" and i give a middle finger to the camera. "now, we move onto a happier time. quiet literally. 'happier than ever', 'love is embarrassing' and 'the blue' when did you write these? was it before or after south africa?" she asks. "umm, i mean i think they were small ideas before south africa but definitely came into fruition after south africa. i actually think 'love is embarrassing' was written before south africa? i think, yeah because i remember you telling me you thought i fancied him and i was like oh my god this is embarassing can everyone tell!" i laugh. "you're telling me, i inspired one of the songs?" grace says in shock. "of course!" i say. "i'm honoured, can i get like 10% or something then?" she asks. "umm, no. sorry, the label take enough of my money" i laugh. "fair enough. now, the last 4 are all love songs so i'm guessing this is post south africa?" she asks. "yes, george asked me to be his girlfriend in south africa and i wrote these after that. although, i was basically planning our wedding before south africa anyways!" i say and then realise i just said that in front of george and palmed my mouth "why did i say that? it's the bloody vodka cranberry! george, i'm not a psycho i swear!" i say, feeling the affects of the alcohol. grace just laughing at me, so is george. "oh god, let's continue" i say. "cheeky little arthur hill feature?" grace says. "yes, we worked together on that song. it's funny because arthur literally doesn't have a girlfriend and hasn't had one for ages but we were writing like the soppiest love song ever but i don't know, i had already written a large part of it, then he came in and wrote his verse and helped fill some gaps and he's like one of my best friends and also one of george's so it was the closest i could get to having george on the album because he can't sing" i say. "that's really rude" he called from behind the camera. "truth hurts babe, truth hurts" i say stirring my drink with my straw. "i'm living for your sass today" grace says. "also, dress? what the fuck, i do not want to hear about your sexual activities!" she says jokingly. "i know! that was a naughty song. yeah, um well it's there. george doesn't like that song" i say. "what? george! why not?" grace asks and george starts shouting from behind the camera. "here, george come speak your truth! come on" grace says getting up and offering george her seat, i put my head in my hands, now three vodka cranberries deep. "no, i never said i didn't like it. i just said my parents are probably going to listen to it and that's weird so i advised you didn't put it on the album" he explains. "and i did it anyways!" i say back. "well i know because my mum heard it" he says. "shoutout mrs clarkey! we love you" i shout to the camera. "jesus christ" george laughs and mutters under his breath and walks off again. grace re-enters. "okay, we don't have long left so i want to ask you, what would you say to the little elena that got dumped and wrote 'enough for you' and 'vampire'" grace says making it deep again. "jesus christ" i sigh, feeling emotional. "i would just hug her. like i was so broken, so sad and i felt so used and just not worthy of anything" all my humour from minutes ago vanished, i was now a sad drunk not a happy one. i felt tears brim in my eyes, i wipe them away. george notices and grabs a tissue. "ahh babe!" grace smiles at me. george comes running over with the tissue. he passes it to me and rubs my back. "i want to say something though. i met you when you were going through it all and the difference in you today and then is insane. you have grown so much and i think it's so evident and you should so proud of yourself. i love you because of that, you allowed me to do because you worked on yourself" he kissed my head and then walked off, i rubbed his shoulder affectionately as he walked away. "guys! what the fuck, i'm going to cry too. i've never seen george be that nice and serious" grace says also now on the verge of tears. i wipe my tears away. "i would also tell her, a good one is on the way so just hang on" i smile back at george and he reciprocates it.