Ordained

Chapter Ninety-Five

Emmeline fought to keep her eyes open as the carriage rocked her. The journey to the capital was long and the constant motion was making her feel worse.

Her stomach was cramping constantly, her nausea making her feel like her insides were being churned like butter. She hadn't eaten much before leaving so as to hopefully avoid being sick, but that had clearly been in vain. That all too familiar bitter taste still lingered in her mouth. It felt like it burned but she chalked it up to acid reflux. Given how often she was being sick, she understood why her mouth and throat would feel acidic and taste bitter.

She felt best when her eyes were closed, and her head tilted back against the cushions, but Cassius's worried gaze had her trying her best to appear normal. He was already on edge enough without the added stress of her feeling unwell.

"Emmeline, I can see you struggling. Go back to sleep if you need to." He advised with a clipped, concerned voice. Rolling her gaze over to him she met his pensive gaze.

"I am fine." She smiled, too tired to appear more energetic. A lack of food in her system was taking its toll, although she wouldn't admit it aloud. Her body felt heavy, her limbs clumsy and unresponsive. Most of all she felt tired, more tired than she could ever remember feeling.

Cassius tutted, placing his hand to her cheek for a moment. "You are a terrible liar." The humour didn't quite reach his eyes as he gently cupped her face. Her lids fluttered shut at the contact and it was almost impossible to resist snuggling into his chest.

Well, that was until another roll of nausea hit her.

"Stop the carriage." She blurted, launching herself forward out of Cassius' arms and throwing her head out of the carriage. It was most unbecoming, but it was that or throw up inside the carriage and the thought of having to smell vomit for the next few hours was unappealing. Plus she didn't think she'd ever recover from the embarrassment if she vomited on Cassius' shoes.

A hand patted her on the back as she wretched, her mind too preoccupied with her pain in her stomach to focus on how everyone must have been watching her. A squeal of concern sounded behind the carriage and a few seconds later the sound of Clementine's feet pounded towards her. "My Lady!" She exclaimed with wide eyes.

She wasn't sure when Carmen had arrived, but her voice seemed to grate against her already frayed nerves. "Why is she being sick? Is she with child?" She screeched under her breath in a curious mix of whispering and shouting that Emmeline wasn't sure she could replicate. Cassius swelled with indignation.

"Don't be ridiculous mother." He hissed. "Emmeline has been unwell for several days now."

Carmen made an impatient sound. "Well then you should have left her behind like I said. She will only delay our progress."

Cassius' grip on the side of the carriage turned his knuckles white. "By all means mother, go on ahead, do not let us delay you any further." It was a dismissal if ever she heard it, had she been upright she would've apologised for causing a problem, but her head was still bent over a bush, her hands on her knees with Clementine holding her. Her maid had escorted her quickly into the woods that lined the road, taking her away from prying eyes. Emmeline made a mental note to thank her later.

It was almost thirty minutes before she could get back in the carriage. Half of the delegation had gone ahead with Carmen, the rest staying and waiting for her. Her cheeks flamed red as she walked out of the woods and back into the carriage, she could feel the eyes of the guards, and carriage drivers on her. "I'm sorry." She said loudly to Cassius as she accepted his help into the carriage, hoping her words would be loud enough for the others to hear.

Cassius simply pulled her into his arms, holding her against him. It felt awkward for a few seconds, her internal monologue questioning if this closeness was allowed, but she quickly melted into his touch, tossing her concerns out of the window.

"I am worried about you." He finally voiced. She had her eyes closed, enjoying how comfortable she was as Cassius gently stroked her hair.

"Hmm?" She hummed, feeling slightly sleepy.

"I'm sorry my mother asked that. She shouldn't have insulted you like that, especially in front of others." His tone was clipped, irritated. She shushed him, patting his chest.

"I don't care." She sighed. "I'm not by the way." She added afterwards, hoping it would make him smile.

He scoffed loudly. "I should hope not." He laughed, the rumbling of his chest against her cheek feeling nice.

"Well, just in case you were worried." She added, smiling.

With a pout she was lifted out of his embrace so that he could meet her gaze. "Emmie, you have conducted yourself honourably from the start. It is me who has behaved dishonourably by courting another in front of you."

Emmeline blinked, her brain was sluggish and didn't immediately connect the dots. "Wait, who have you been with?" She asked, frowning deeply.

Cassius quirked an eyebrow. "I was referring to my formal courtship of Ottilie Claude, with whom I was not with in any way that mattered."

She sighed, not sure that his answer made her feel any better. "Don't be with anyone but me." She murmured, her eyes growing heavy as sleep took her.

"I wouldn't dream of it." She heard vaguely before lapsing into unconsciousness.

When she opened her eyes she found her face buried into soft fabric. Cassius sat with his head resting against the back of the carriage, Emmeline sat on his lap. She didn't remember climbing onto him so intimately and immediately spluttered embarrassed apologies. He simply chuckled. "Emmie, I lifted you onto my lap because it was more comfortable for me than having you leant against my side, my shoulder was going to sleep."

He pressed a finger to her flushed cheek with a smile. "You always blush such a pretty colour."

Returning to her seat, not beside him but opposite him, she opened the window, desperate for some fresh air. "Are you feeling sick again?" He rushed to help her, his hand on her back, but she shook her head.

"No, I just wanted some air."

Relief flooded over him. "Good, that's good." 

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Author's Note:

So I had to rewrite the line: "I was referring to my formal courtship of Ottilie Claude, with whom I was not with in any way that mattered." 

Originally it read "A great many women, but I was referring to my formal courtship of Ottilie Claude, with whom I was not with in any way that mattered."

BUT... I thought it made Cassius seemed like too much of a fuck-boy so it had to go.

Sophie x