Waking up to my alarm feels weird again. Going back to school feels weird again. Everything feels weird again. Having to go and face my 'friends' again feels weird, and lastly, seeing miss G teaching me is going to feel so weird.
"Princess, are you awake!" dad calls out from downstairs.
"Yeah Yeah, I am up! Still half asleep but getting dressed, we're making progress."
I can hear a slight giggle from him and I finish my morning routine. I head inside the school gates and am suddently faced with the reality of my life. The depression, not because of school itself but because I know that all that homework is going to weight on me untill it outweighs my mental health and I break down. I am hit with the reality of not having Joseph around me and having to eat alone and I am sure 'The Girls' will make fun of me. I am sure that seeing miss G TEACH me will break me, crumble me and push me into the darkest corner of my mind. I reach a group of classmates including Beth, Bert and Lana.
"Hey guys, how was your vacation?" I ask, hoping to get involved in their conversation.
"Great! I went to a concert with some friends from baseball" Beth answers.
"And I had a date....but it didn't end up so well and we never spoke again.", Bert follows.
"Oh, that's not such a good thing" I say and the others nod in agreement.
The bell rings and we walk to class together. At the door I can see Jay waiting for me and as we are all waiting for the teacher to arrive and unlock the door. I take a place across Jay next to Lana. Lana and I continue talking about our vacation and Jay joins in. I don't mind, I mean she did say horrible stuff but lately when the other girls we're being shitty to me, she never said anything and looked away. Away from me. Away from the girls. She has kind of been the nice one in this situation, too kind that she doesn't recognise the pressure the others put on her to play their game of ignoring and bullying me.
"Where were you this morning? The girls asked about you" she says and I look visually confused. I open my mouth but nothing comes out except a small sigh and I try again.
"I thought after friday before the exams it was clear you didn't want me there anymore."
"We do want you still, you were the one coming up to us and saying all that stuff we never even thought about."
"Stuff YOU never thought about, but maybe the rest did because what would have been the reason for their behaviour then?"
"You may be right, I hope to stay friends with you and hang out with you sometime because I never intended to hurt you, and I apologise for that rude message I send in september with the stuff about your dad-"
"It's forgiven, I get that it was all a very stressfull time for us all-"
"My parents had just screamed at me for being on my phone instead of studying and I was trying to get pics of the pages and no one would reply and I was just so scared, I-"
"You could have told me but I knew it was unlike you to act like that, and yes, I was surprised and having a hard time myself wich made me even more emotional, and so I should also apologise for not thinking clear in the moment and acting all out of nowhere-"
At this point we both can't continue by all the build up emotions rushing trough our heart, our brain before taking over our thoughts and then everyone suddently starts moving. It seems the teacher has arrived and opened the class.
"So, we're good?" she asks for confirmation.
"Yeah, and from now on, we're telling it if we misunderstand eachother right?"
YOU ARE READING
Beneath the Surface
Художественная прозаTraumatized by her past, yet desperate to grow and have a beautiful future, she navigates through life. A positive mindset it may seem, but is that really the truth or just a facade for the world? She dreams of a bright future as a writer, perhaps a...
