Letters: A Tokka Fanfic

11

I had barely slept by the time the sun came out and I was up again. Everything felt hazy as I went downstairs and made Toph her tea. I'd been making it every morning and it had become part of my routine. I barely said good morning to Katara as I went outside to where Toph was trtraining. I left the tea before turning to go back inside. I usually sat to watch her train a bit but I couldn't bear to this morning. Instead I made my way back up to my room and laid in bed again, closing my eyes and throwing an arm over them to shield them from the sun. I didn't bother looking when I heard the knock and Katara's voice from the door.

"Sokka? Are you ok?" I grunted in response as I felt the bed dip slightly beside me. "What happened to make you act like a zombie this morning?" I sat up without looking at her and buried my head in my hands.

"I think I've ended up being a terrible friend. I tried to make things right, I tried to... and now I'm realizing I'd been ignoring so much of her even before I left. I don't have the right to look for her forgiveness now."

"What do you mean?"

"I never realized how alone she felt. I thought she knew how special she was and instead she seems to think no one could ever want her other than Satoru. I never could've imagined she might think that way. Did I ever really know her that well? Or was she the one always looking after me and my messes?" Katara was quiet for a moment and I felt the truth in my words as they hung in the air. She had always seemed so bright and made it seem like nothing when she listened to my problems. But how often had she shared her own? Not often enough. I should've realized she was holding back. I should've made sure she knew she could talk to me.

"Maybe you're right," my heart sank, "so make it right. Be there for her now."

" That's easier said than done."

"I never said it was easy. It won't be. But what other choice is there? You can't go back in time so just do what you can now. She could use it." With that she got up and left. I continued to lay there for a while, mulling over what I was supposed to do next. Eventually, I got up and made my way downstairs, only to find a very quiet Toph at the table with her tea.

"Where'd you go?" I startled slightly, not expecting her to notice my absence.

"I was laying down." I replied simply.

"You still made my tea."

"I made it first then went back up to lay down." She stayed quiet for a moment and I moved to make some breakfast for us—another habit for when she was done training.

"Thank you." It was quiet, but I heard her. I didn't say anything and we sat in silence until the food was ready.

"I'm sorry. I was too combative last night. I didn't really take into account how you were feeling and I should have." I finally spoke as I sat with our plates. She took a big bite and said nothing so I continued.

"I always thought I knew you best, but I've been realizing that I missed a lot. I should've been there for you more. I should've made sure you knew how important you were to me and everyone else around you. I hate the idea that you might be settling. If..." I paused, the next words catching in my throat before I could slowly force them out. "If dating Satoru will help you to realize how special you are, then I'm all for it. There's plenty of time for you to decide whether or not he makes you happy and I'll be here to support you no matter what." She seemed to hesitate before finally she nodded.

"Thanks, Sokka." A small smile made its way to my lips. It was a bittersweet feeling to be thanked for something I didn't really want to say. Of course I would support her, but I didn't like the idea of supporting their relationship. Still, if it was what's best for her, I wouldn't hesitate.