Blood in the Water | 18+

𝘊𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘛𝘸𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘺 𝘖𝘯𝘦

𝘚𝘵𝘦𝘷𝘦

⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅

I can't remember the last time I showered, or ate, or slept.

All I see are white walls. All I hear is the beeping of machines. I'm reminded of the steady beat of Aurora's heart. That very heart which gave out last week. The traitorous muscle in her chest has given up one too many times. Every day it seems like Aurora drifts further from me and I'm scrambling to keep her tethered to me. Every single time I closed my eyes I was tortured with the way she crumpled off my lap, the way that she whispered I love you, just one more time.

"Steve-"

"No," My hand held Auroras, so tightly I'm surprised neither of us had lost blood circulation. I couldn't take my eyes off the shallow rise and fall of her chest, the way that her own lungs had to work three times as hard because her father punctured the organ, the muscles fused together by the surgeon's trembling hands. I'm sure they were normally steady, but I was waiting in the room, and I was ravenous. If someone messed up, if someone cost Aurora her life, cost me her life, I would kill. I didn't care who, I didn't care about their life if they took away the one person who meant anything to me, everything to me, I would kill them without blinking. I jumped when a hand was placed on my shoulder, turning my head to see Natasha standing beside me, and I glanced around the room for Bucky, for Enzo or Dante, for anyone trying to make me leave.

"This isn't healthy," I tried to shake her hand away from my shoulder but she just gripped my shirt collar, forcing the appendage to stay on my body, "Aurora wouldn't want this."

"You don't know what she would want," I snapped, and I know I was being unreasonable to be angry with everyone, but she wasn't their lifeline, she was mine. "Stop acting like you do. You don't know her. Not like me."

"No," Natasha conceded, and I thought that would be the end of it, but the horrific screech of a chair being drug across linoleum made the hair on the back of my neck rise, out of irritation and fear of what she was going to say. "I don't know her like you, but I do know if she was awake, she would be crying because of how you're neglecting yourself," I finally dared to meet Natasha's eyes, and she offered a small smile, "I do know that she fell in love with you the second you killed the man at the lunch with her father, I know that she secretly watches you when you wake up in the morning because she's in awe of the artwork on your body, I know the day she left she cried for thirteen hours straight in my bedroom because she didn't know what to do without you." My eyes started to burn, my nose turning red, "I know that when she wakes up, she'll want you to be the strong one because she'll be scared, and she'll need you to be her strength."

"I'm so scared Nat," I finally whispered, finally admitting it to someone other than the demons in my head, "I'm so scared she'll never wake up, I'm so scared I'll never have a future with her. I'm scared I'm forcing her to fight when her body wants to give up."

The dam broke and I collapsed into Natasha's lap, hyperventilating as the sobs ripped through my body. And for the first time in a week, I let go of Aurora's hand, to grip onto my best friend's girlfriend for some sort of stability. Natasha didn't waiver, all she did was curl herself around my head, shielding me from the noise, from the white walls, from my half-alive lover. I cried until I was shaking, until my eyes ached and I couldn't breathe. And Natasha sat quietly, holding me as I completely broke. "Do you remember," Natasha started as I finally calmed down, pulling back to wipe my cheeks and look at her, "In college, right after you and what's her face broke up,"

"Peggy," I told her, and Natasha smiled, playfully rolling her eyes.

"Sure Peggy, after you two broke up you told Bucky and me you didn't think love was for you, that you would never find your fairytale love," I nodded, I vaguely remembered the whole situation. Peggy cheated on me with a man named Daniel, I swore off love after that, "And we both told you that you're getting ahead of yourself, you're young and the world was just growing for all of us," I sluggishly nodded my head again, "Well, Aurora is that fairytale love for you Steve, we see the way you look at each other, she's your princess but she loves you as an equal," I dropped my head again, my shoulders shaking as I held in another sob, "Don't let her wake up to see you this way, gaunt because you haven't eaten in a week, you're still covered in her blood, you need a little bit of sleep," I blinked because I hadn't realized I was still covered in Aurora's blood, and that made me nauseous, the room spinning in circles around me, I felt like I had vertigo, "Go home, take a shower, eat something, take a nap, she'll be here when you come back."