Chapter 12 : Losing myself

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Nokukhanya's POV

My mom brushes my back as I continue to sob, well today is the 10th of January and I woke up to my mom screaming. At first I thought she was just being dramatic but I woke up and ran to the direction where her screams were loud I barged into their room, my parent's room, only to see my mom on her knees and my dad covered in blood.

My blood ran cold, I suddenly felt my world coming to a standstill, okay I slap my self and I go fetch a knife to cut my self so I can wake up from this traumatizing nightmare. I go back to their room with blood dripping from my wrist, leaving a trail of it's droplets, I sit down and look as she calms herself down and pulls out the phone to probably call an ambulance.

Things were so good, I told them about Sizwe and all the events that took place that night. They didn't judge me, they didn't even hate me or scold me, instead they hugged me and they told me to pray about it. I felt weak, I felt miserable but they are my anchor. They keep me going, they are the reason why I keep on working hard I want them to say "my daughter is a doctor and I'm proud of her" one day, I guess I should say I wanted them to say that. My mom is here but my dad isn't, my dad was my everything, he guided me through everything, trust me I love my mom to death but I lived for my dad and I'd die for my mom, there's a difference.


I smile as I fall back into the same whole I fell into. It's a vacuum and it's completely dark, but this time it's different, this time I feel like my life was taken away from me, like I was dragged out of the light and locked in the darkness.

I'm losing myself and right now there's nothing I can do about it. I stand up and  head to my mom to kiss her forehead, I might be broken but she knew him way before I existed in this world so she'll need all the support she can get.

I take her phone and I start calling family members. This is going to be a long long week.



Greetings my loves!!🤍🤍today I just want to say thank you, I'm really grateful for you guys. I've seen the views and votes and I love you guys so much🤍I just want to tell you guys that as this is my first novel I'm basically introducing myself. I relate to this novel so much and I just want you guys to feel the emotions in this novel so please do interact🤍🤍🌊

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