☁️ Poetry from the stars in my eyes and the constellations in my thoughts ☁️

🥀Feeling Off 🥀

⚠️ TW: fighting, cursing, mention of war

I'm feeling a little bit weird
Just a little out of sorts
Days feel awfully slow
But weeks feel awfully short

I feel like things keep shifting
But I can't see where they are
Like cracks in the ice I'm standing on
But I'm blinded by other's scars

I feel like my life was peaceful for a moment
Then everything snapped at once
I fell through the ice into the deep ocean
And my life's all been undone

I'm feeling more distant than ever
But I'm not feeling apathetic
It's almost like a half-depression
But maybe I'm just really pathetic

Maybe I just really hate change
So everything's getting to me
Maybe I'm just not ready to swim
But the water is ready for me

Things are drifting away in the sunset
And I'm reeling new things in to shore
But I feel like I'm losing parts of myself in the process
To this life, is there really more?

Can I gain back more than what I've lost?
Can I return the joy of what I'm losing?
Will the new path of my life be extremely rough?
Or will I be easily perusing?

Is this the road I'm meant to travel?
Should I say that thing?
Should I make some sort of massive life change?
Or in that situation, intervene?

Everything nowadays just feels so numbing
There's so many fights over fucking nothing
So many boycotts and hate from all sides
For once in our lives, can we please not patronize?

Everything in my personal life feels so small
But in moments like this,
I feel like its so big I can't move at all
I want change to come and I want to grow
But this pace just feels so rushed and thrown

Internal and external wars keep on brewing
For my whole life, my emotions have been stewing
I'm in control of parts of myself
But it feels like new reactions are being taken off the shelf

I'm just so confused and exhausted and in pain
I feel like I have no one to confide in or explain
I just want my comfort and my peace back
Please, 2024, seal up the cracks.