Forgotten (Book 1 of the Remembrance Series)

Doodles Over Noodles

(A/n- Have one of Author's crappy doodles :3 ur welcome, u can shred it if you want XD stick dat device in da shredda! If the colors seem weird, I edited the contrast so they pop out more)

   I sat at the table, watching Shizuo as he drew in the sketch pad. We were having a very fancy meal, take out Russia Sushi, and he was doodling! I scoffed and giggled mentally at my own amusing self. It seemed Shizuo was more happy now though, and the house didn't seem so cold anymore. Maybe drawing would really help him right now. I chuckled quietly everytime a noodle dripped from his mouth, causing him to give it a wide eyed look before putting it back in his bowl. It was so... adorable!
   He would stare intently at his paper and scribble in a few details between each bite, completely focused on finishing the sketch, and shoveling the 'well prepared' dinner successfully into his mouth, and not his chin. I was suprised when he actually finished before me, pushing the bowl to the side and putting all his attention to the peice of paper in front of him. Anytime I tried to see what he was drawing, he would cover the sheet and look at me with a slight blush. It was extremely cute. I mean, like, cuter than a box full of fluffy kittens in pikachu costumes. That's how cute my cute embarrassed Shizu-Chan was. At some point, the only reason I tried to peep at his doodle was to see that face. I would have to find more ways to entice this reaction.
   He then stood up, giving me a hesitant look. His mouth opened and shut now and again as he decided whether or not to ask.
   "Izaya...?" He asked, a darker blush blossoming upon his face. It was so adorable that even I blushed. I now remembered how his drawings always made him very shy, and became embarrassed when people asked to see them or saw them.
   "What is my love?~" I purred, already guessing what he needed. He looked at the sketch before looking at me.
   "Do you have any colored pencils?" He asked quickly, and I chuckled.
   "First cupboard on the left, bottom shelf." He seemed suprised that someone like me, an informant, would have coloured pencils. "Mairu and Kururi use them sometimes." I smirked, and he hurried to grab them, hurying from the room. I started to clear the bowls away, cleaning up the small dinner mess.

                                ◆♥◆

   My attention was pulled away from the TV, and I turned to see a crimson faced Shizuo, holding out a paper. I took the sketch I had wanted to see so badly and blushed as I surveyed the photo. It was of me laying on the couch, staring boredly at the TV. Now I know what the flash was, at least. It was amazing how much the person looked like me, if he were life sized he could pass as my exact twin! I smiled brightly and set the sketch aside before jumping at Shizuo. He let out a slight groan and I remembered his wounds. I tugged us back over the arm of the couch, and luckily Shizuo didn't crush me.
   "You could be a famous artist, ya' know..." I giggled, nuzzling into his neck. His skin became warmer as I savoured his scent, kissing his lips passionately. His cheeks were tinted a bright red, and I chuckled.
   "D-do you really think so?" He stuttered, as if no one had ever complimented his work in that way. I smirked and nodded. He smiled somewhat, his eyes aglow with joy. I used to think him so cruel, so... emotionless, only knowing to fight, yet here he was, turning out to be a shy and innocent man who suffered... because of me. He suffered because I forgot, because I decided to play tough guy when we first met after we broke up. It was confusing, to be honest. I still had very few of the memories from before highschool, which was severly sad because I lost many of the moments we spent together.
   I came to feel, as I held the monster, my monster; as he had reffered to himself in the letter that brought us together once more, that I had to repay him for what I had done. I was the reason he was sick, the reason he acted so violent. It was my fault he was seen as a monster. I owed him this. I was going to lay down my life for him if I had to, as he had done for me. This was my silent vow to him.

                                ◆♥◆

   I silently stared at his frail, sleeping form. His ragged breath warmed my arm as he lay against my chest, arms wrapped around my waist and his face in the crook of my elbow. He breathed slowly, and sometimes, he would seem to stop breathing. It was then that I would panic, until suddenly he would take in a sharp breath, his face becoming pained. It was heart breaking to see him in such a state, I wanted to look away. I didn't though, in fear that if I did, his life would slip out of my grasp, and I would miss it. For some reason, I felt that if he died, I would want to be there, to watch. I felt it would be wrong for him to pass without me there, by his side. I felt sick and twisted for thinking this, because I would never let my Shizu-Chan die.
   The thought was my own kind of love, though. I wanted him to know I was there the whole time, to know he wouldn't die alone, and that it would be sort of like our last farewell. Why the hell was I even thinking this?! I won't let him die ever! He and I- we are both Gods now! We can't ever die! Wait, what?