Luis: So what's on your mind? Wanna learn some moves? Need advice on how to take down an opponent? I'm your guy!
Me: Yup, and that opponent is you!
Luis: I try being nice to you for once, and this is the response I get?
Me: Stop distracting me with your small talk! Let's get started.
😑🖕
Luis: Hey now, let's keep it clean! I may be a fighter but I'm also a gentleman 😜
Me: 😉😞
Luis: Uh, you're kind of sending mixed signals...but if you wanna learn some MMA, you gotta use your words!
Me: 🫖😛
Luis: Haha nice try but I don't speak Teapot! Spit it out in ENGLISH, what do you want to know?
Me: 🎉👯
Luis: You wanna party? I'm always down to party, but let's do it after training. I've got some moves to teach you!
Me: 😂😜
Luis: Alright rookie, that's enough out of you. Before I report you to the police for unruly drunk behavior, let's get started on training! What kind of moves do you want to learn? Take downs, submissions, strikes? The world is your oyster!
Me: And you are my pearl-
😅😁
Luis: Haha nice, you're excited down there! You should be, MMA is a sickly-sweet, arousing sport. Alright, let's start with some basic striking. You gotta learn the jab! It's the most important strike in MMA. You gotta pop that jab like a pro!
Me: 🥰🤣
Luis: I'm glad you're so excited, but let's keep the conversation rated TV-MA! I'm here to help you learn about MMA, not to engage in appropriate conversations. Let's focus on the sport and techniques with as many suggestive themes as we can, okay?
Me: 🤦♀️😮
Luis: Alright, let's get back to basics. You wanna learn MMA, right?
Me: (No.)
Luis: So, jab! Cross! Hook! Uppercut! Those are the basics. Learn them and you'll be on your way to being a pro!
Me: 😏😭
Luis: Don't get frustrated! MMA takes time and practice. You gotta be patient and put in the work. Remember, discipline and determination are key! Keep training and you'll get there!
Me: Damn, I lost. To someone like you? Unbelievable 🤦♀️.
Luis: Don't worry man, we all lose sometimes. It's how you bounce back that matters. Get back in the gym and work on your technique. You'll be back on top in no time!
Me: Did...did you just assume my gender? 🤨
Luis: ...No.
Me: ...
Luis: ...
Me: Fine, I'll do that, but...I lost to you! I'll never be able to live down this embarrassment.
Luis: Hey now, don't be hating on yourself! I'm just better than you, that's all.
Me: 😑
Luis: But for real, you gotta learn to take a loss. Everyone loses sometimes, even me! But you gotta get back up and keep fighting. That's what MMA is all about.
Me: Bruh...you wanna know how the fight went?
Luis: I'm always down to hear about a good fight! Spill the tea, what went down?
Me: It wasn't very good obviously, or I would've won!
-------------------------------------------------------------
Match replay:
Luiz: Let's rumble!
Me: Yeah, I'm ready for our fight!
Luiz: Hah there's no way you can beat me you puny little...yeah.
Me: Oh yeah? Abraca-fuck-you!
Luiz: Oh, I'd love that very much ;).
Me: Aww man, that didn't work.
Luiz: My turn! Want some tea?
Me: Yes please! *Drinks the tea*
LOSES -60% HEALTH
Luiz: Ha ha, that tea was poisonous, I win!
Me: Not so fast, you have to defeat my henchmen!
Luiz: Hahaha even with all three of you I will win!
Me: Oh yeah? How 'bout this! Hit it!
Henchmen: *Start dancing*
Luiz: Uh...I don't know what to make of this...
Me: (Yes! He's distracted!)
Luiz: I loved that dance! It was amazing!
Me: Really? XD.
(Dammit, missed my chance).
Luiz: No you dimwit, that was the worst performance I've ever seen.
Me: What? You lied to me!!
LOSES 40% MENTAL
Winner = Luiz (MMA + 1)
Luiz: Yay I win! Was that really your best effort? ;)
Me: Nooooo!!!! Damn I lost.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Luiz: Bruh, you need to step up your game. I just owned you in that fight and you didn't even land a single punch. Get back in the gym and come back when you're ready to fight like a man!
Me: Stop assuming my gender!!!
Score = CSF - MMA = 1 - 1
Winners, tied = CSF 🔪 & MMA ✊
YOU ARE READING
Sweet Cupcakes (and other "stories")
AdventureA bunch of D&D style stories I made with AI. Some of these are going to reference to my other story, FNF Multiverse. So if for some magical reason you see this description, go give that book a read instead, because that's an actual, readable FNF sto...
