Exotic

XVI

Kath

I brought the plates into the kitchen where Nat was loading the dishwasher. She noticed me and smiled but then frowned slightly when she was that one of us hasn't eaten our food. And I feel bad. It's not because I'm being snobby and turning my nose up at everything, it's just that I haven't stomached food very well since Sydney's accident. I've thrown up everything I've eaten and I know that the smoothie and few bites that I did have are coming back up later.

"Are you alright?" Nat asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine." I nod, putting Syd's empty plate into the dishwasher, "What should I do with this?"

"Put it in the food bin. Who's plate was that?" Nat's eyes were soft and she stared at me like she already knew the answer.

"It was mine. I'm sorry." I answer quietly, scraping the food into the compost bin and putting that into the dishwasher.

"I would take it personally but I have noticed that you didn't eat much while Sydney was in the hospital." she said, "And you look exhausted. Please, don't be offended by that, but you look shattered."

"I'm fine." I pull my lips into a tight smile, "I'm gonna head back upstairs. Thanks, Nat."

I sprinted up the stairs so she couldn't catch me. I went to the bathroom to sit with myself for a little bit. That bit of privacy that I need. I feel really anxious and I don't know why. It started when Sydney was taken by the paramedics. There's this... Constant nausea settled in the pit of my stomach and I can't eat because of it. I can't sleep well because of it. I have a constant headache and my eyes sting and water a lot. Sometimes, it gets so painful that I have nothing to do but cry and hope that the exhaustion will eventually take my body. It's painful and annoying.

I wash my face before heading back to Sydney's room. My limbs are a little bit shaky from the tiredness and my head is spinning. It's making the nausea worse and my body aches. I collapse onto Sydney's bed and let out a pained groan, as it hurt my head a little. I feel sweaty and itchy and it's gross.

"You okay?" Sydney's soft voice asks.

"Living the dream." I force a smile as I lift my head to meet her eyes, soft, just like Nat's, "How about yourself?"

"My pain meds have kicked in now so I'm doing better. You don't look so hot though, are you sure you're okay?"

"I'm not sure whether to be touched or offended by that."

"You don't look well, Kath." Sydney stated.

"I feel fine." I lied. I buried my face into her sheets and inhale the scent, "I'm just tired." which isn't a lie. Maybe an under exaggeration, but not a lie.

"You just had a nap." Sydney chuckled. Ha ha. No, I didn't. She woke me up as soon as I was nodding off.

"Not really. You woke me up by the time I'd actually gone to sleep."

"Oh, I'm sorry, Kath. Do you want to try to go sleep now?"

"If you don't mind."

"Not at all! The pain meds make me a bit dozey anyway."

"Okay, do you need help getting comfortable?" I ask, getting up because I know she will. She just nodded and I helped her lay flat. I got the duvet over her and climbed into the bed myself. But I didn't cuddle into her this time. I feel too sweaty and clamy to touch someone else. I laid down with my back to her and assumed the fetal position.

It wasn't long until I fell asleep, and it was almost as if my soul smiled.

"Kath! Kath! Help! Please!" I heard Sydney's voice call. She sounded like she was in pain and so I ran. But I wasn't anywhere in particular. Just a black void where my sighs echoed and my breaths fogged in front of me.