You.. took an unexpected detour.
" S-Sir, Valentino, please hold on. " You squealed, trying to take his four arms off you. " This is going to hurt a lot more if you resist! " You laughed, shaking the man off.
" DO YOUR JOB YOU FUCKIN'- " Velvette yelled, pointing a finger at you. " CALM THE FUCK DOWN! " Vox's static voice echoed thru the halls, grabbing the fashonista by her shoulders. " If you yell at her, you think 's gonna help? " He gripped her shoulders with more force.
" If you haven't noticed, she's the only thing keeping him alive right now because you genially decided to poke him with a fucking ANGELIC SPEAR! " His static continued, his screen glitching uncontrollably.
" Oh, so NOW it's my fault?! You told me to bring the angel here! It's not my fault she tried attacking us! Me stabbin' Val was a fuckin' accident! " She yelled back, stomping her foot on the ground.
" Well maybe next time, I don't know, ask politely?! Play the fake friend card?! Anything but instigate a fight with one of heaven's higher fucking angels?! " He hissed, getting closer to a system shut-down.
" How the fuck was I supposed to know this weak looking ass witch was acquainted with the leader of the exorcists?! " She screamed back, gripping her hair in desperation.
" WILL BOTH OF YOU SHUT UP?! " You suddenly yelled, your wings opening and your halo shining brighter than normal. You were about to burn them with holy light if they didn't shut up.
Valentino groaned further, loosing a whole lot of blood.
" Now I'm not sure you realize what position you're in, but you better be glad I even decided to help your little moth friend over here, because I remind you, you're sinners and I'm an angel! Now I might be sympathetic towards the likes of you, and I don't agree with the extermination, but I might just call Adam and his army right here, right now if you keep yelling while I'm working! Understood?! "
" Understood.. "
" Yes ma'am. "
You huffed, turning back to the man who was still gripping onto you for dear life. " Good. " You sighed, taking off your gloves. " Now this might hurt, but uh, don't worry. " You gave him a nervous smile, white and glowing claws prolonging from your fingernails.
" H-hold on, what the fuck are- " Valentino mumbled, but you cut him off by stabbing repeatedly his bleeding wound with said claws.
" AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKKKKKK! "
A light emitted by your nails and his wound, and you continued.
Vox and Velvette were too frozen in shock, or fear, to do anything about it. Whatever it was, you were glad they weren't interrupting you.
One last slash, and you watched as the wound closed on itself. " Here. " You stood up from your seat, wiping off he sweat on your forehead.
Valentino laid there unmoving for a few seconds before letting out a shaky breath.
" Is.. Is he even alive?! " Vox blurted out, gripping onto Velvette. " He is. I just healed him. " You explained, stretching your legs.
" You call that healin'? " Velvette shouted, covering her face.
" Uhm, it's designed to work better on angels, so uh, the pain's a.. side effect. " You chuckled, shrugging.
" He'll be out cold for a few hours, nothing to worry about. " You added, putting your gloves back on.
Suddenly the doors swung open, revealing a shocked spider-human sinner.
" W... What the actual fuck?! " He screeched, pointing to you then to Valentino. " Is.. is he alive? " He deadpanned, brushing off his nape.
" He is. " You confirmed as the male huffed, seemingly annoyed.
" I knew it was too good to be true.. " He mumbled, shaking his head.
" Uh.. I guess work's moved? " He shrugged, taking a step back. You clasped your hands together, an idea popping up in your head.
" Wait! Uh, hello, my name's [name], as you can see I'm an angel, hehe.. You see I was sent here by my boss to.. investigate stuff.. and while I was investigating stuff I met Velvette over here who was holding what I was supposed to investigate.. " You recalled the decapitated head of the exorcist slain by what you were sure was another angelic weapon.
" Who then contacted Vox over here, who told her to bring me to him, for, uh, I still don't know, but whatever! And met this guy who wanted to hire me as a porn star, and I sadly had to pass on the offer and uh, they started arguing and got mad, Velvette tried attacking me so I pulled out my angelic spear, and after some boom-boom-pow Velvette got a hold of it, slipped and accidentally stabbed Valentino over there..! And then uhm.. "
The spider-sinner looked at you bewildered, crossing all four of his arms.
" Then they got all worried and since earlier I found out that my kind has been killing you for no reason other than overpopulation, I felt bad and offered my help, and then.. here we are. Oh! And I watched this commercial, about a.. happy hotel, yes? A rehab for sinners! You see, I'm now mad at heaven and I also really like this idea! So, do you perhaps know where I can find this peculiar hotel? "
You summarized, sweat-dropping.
" ..I do.. " He replied, unsure of himself. You clapped, " Awesome! Oh boy, that was tiring. " You let out a breath of relief, approaching him.
You held your arm out, smiling. " You are? " he clicked his tongue, shaking your hand. " Angel-dust. You're very fuckin' weird, heaven-tits. " He sighed, leaning on the doorway. " Whatever, Charlie's gonna be happy at least, follow me! " He turned around, his long legs taking fast steps.
" Right away! " You smiled, waving goodbye to the Vee's.
" ... "
" Vox, what the fuck just happen'd? "
" I have no idea. "
