Chapter 21 Debate

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Loneliness expresses the pain of being alone and solitude expresses the glory of being alone - Paul Tillich

Loneliness expresses the pain of being alone and solitude expresses the glory of being alone - Paul Tillich

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Alex♤

I can't remember my life before I was ten, it's just a blur of black with ghostly figures dancing across my desolate mind. The more I try to remember the more questions I'm left with until eventually I give up trying all together.

But I know what my life had felt like. It was loneliness and it would sting in my chest and corrupt my mind. It was a shadow that stood by me always watching despite the lack of light because in darkness the loneliness was everywhere.

Sometimes I do wonder if I had a family, if I had a mother who would busy herself in the kitchen or a father who would play ball with me or maybe even a sister, someone I would always protect.

Well I used to think like that and when Eric found me and took me in I was expecting for someone to come looking for me and yet nobody did. I would sit by my bedroom window with my face pushed against the glass and I would stare at the condensation and draw patterns on it with my finger. People walked by and not one person turned in the direction of the academy. No one was coming for me and I had to let that hope go.

Then when I was introduced to the guys my whole life changed. I no longer felt alone and I had people who had a similar story to me. We grew so close together because the only people we had to trust were us and ourselves.

I've always had them and I always will, my brothers are the reason I have hope, hope that one day we will make a name for ourselves, hope that one day I will remember and not forget. They are the reason I breathe and the soul reason as to why I will never stop fighting because all we can do is move on.

Loneliness was my weakness and now it is my solitude, with the darkness now gone the light is the people around me. I suppose loneliness does live in everyone but maybe that's what makes our bond all that more stronger. With loneliness comes the chance to face greatness because at the end of the day it's only you, you have to battle with and some of my best fights were won by looking into the mirror.

Max is throwing combos left and right at the defenceless punching bag. His shoulders are filled with tension and his knuckles make a scraping sound against the leather material of the bag. I can only imagine how much that must hurt and yet he doesn't seem to care.

He seems angry and although I can only see the back of him I just know his face is grim. The man radiates furry, hence him being the one to beat.

Me and Kingston are taking it easy today, for once. I'm holding the bag steady as Kingston throws steady jabs at the centre of it. Sweat has built up above his brows and along his hair line and I'm not surprised considering he's wearing his compression long sleeved shirt. Sometimes I wonder how he hasn't passed out from heat exhaustion.

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