3:02 am

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Hello and welcome to absolute nonsensical chaos. This doesn't match with my AU, nor does it have any sort of historical basis to it. It's... an experiment, to say the least. Either way, I find it mildly amusing, so you might too-

"How's my favourite adopted baby brother doin'?"

"Amerika, why are you in my house?" Germany groaned, flicking on his bedside lamp and staring - tired and appalled - at the USA, who was stood, grinning from ear to ear, in his doorway with his pants draped clumsily over his head and a hula skirt around his waist.

"I wanted to visit my favourite grumpy European!"

"Are you drunk?" Germany grimaced, "I did tell UN to stop allowing vodka and whiskey at meetings..."

"But Mommy and Russie brought themmm!" America whined, "And I'm not drunk!"

"Amerika. You're drunk." Germany sighed once again, "I'm calling NATO..."

"NATO is busyyyyyy!"

"Doing?"

"Babysitting Mommy."

"Ah..." the German grimaced. Of course the UK would be drunk too, of course she would. He thought she was past that problem, though...

"Mommy is an alcoholic!" Ame giggled, flopping down onto the spotless crème carpet.

"I know..." Germany grimaced, "but she's trying to get better, Amerika."

"Yeah-" Ame whined, now sat on the edge of Germany's bed, cuddling an Oktoberfest pillow. "....Hug?"

"Amerika, you broke into my house at 3am with boxer shorts on your head and completely drunk. I'm not hugging you."

"Awhhhh" The US moaned, "I bet the EU will hug me! She's pretty..."

"Amerika, don't go to EU's house!" Ger snapped, grabbing Ame's wrist and yanking him back down onto the floor. "She'll beat you up..."

"I want to marry her..."

"Mein Gott."

Pausing for a moment, America silently seemed to consider whatever his intoxicated mind was concocting, throwing his sunglasses clumsily across the room, bursting into noisy, snotty tears.

"Ame-?"

"I WANT EUUUUUU!" He wailed, bawling and staring up at an extremely fed-up Germany.

"Fine," Germany groaned, fumbling around in his bedside cabinet for his mobile phone and dialling EU's emergency number,

"Germany, it's half past three in the morning."

"Euro, please," Ger begged, "It's Amerika, he's... I'll show you..."

Thoroughly disgruntled, EU agreed, allowing the distraught German to put her on speaker. The USA was there all right, wailing, begging for her and apparently chewing Germany's slipper. Cursing, Euro agreed to drive to Germany's, hurriedly hanging up the phone and getting dressed.

"My wifey is coming!" Ame giggled, hugging Germany in a very haphazard surprise attack.

"SHE'S NOT YOUR WIFE!"

"S-She's not?" America sniffed, "NOOOOO!"

"AMERIKA, CALM DOWN!"

Knock, knock, knock.

Breathing a sigh of relief, Germany rushed down to his (now somewhat damaged) front door, pulling it open by its remaining inner handle and hoping the hinges wouldn't collapse on him.

"Good morning, Germany," the EU smiled out of politeness, irritably fidgeting with her un-straightened hair, which had fallen into quite attractive ringlets overnight. "Where is he, then?"

"My bedroom," Germany grimaced, yawning and leading the EU upstairs.

As they reached Germany's room, Ame peeked his head out around the doorway, gasping with childish delight as he was approached by his exhausted babysitters.

"EUUUUU!" He yelled, a grin spreading across his face as he pulled the unimpressed organisation into a giant unexpected bear hug.

"Hello, USA-"

"Marry me!"

Blushing a rosy red in the dimmed morning light, the EU gently pushed him away, sighing, "America, let's talk about this tomorrow when you're less... hopelessly intoxicated-"

"Okkkk" Ame sniffed again, slumping back into her arms without much resistance.

"I.... Germany, is there anywhere I can put him-?"

"You can put him in my room, it's too late for me to get back to sleep anyway..."

So... Yep, that's it-
If there's enough support, I'll continue it. If not, bye! :)

Operation Amerika || BritSovWhere stories live. Discover now