Paris / Ted Lasso

77. Need You Now

Dress / Gregor Clegane / Davina Targaryen out now!

"I'm sorry, Rebecca, but... I'm not as strong as you. I was too scared to leave him for good."

"You don't think I was scared leaving Rupert?" Rebecca countered. "I was terrified. And rightly so because let me tell you, being alone is fucking horrible. But it's been necessary. 'Cause it's actually started to feel rather wonderful."

"Well, I'm glad to hear that." Deborah agreed. "Besides, Rupert was a self-righteous shit."

"Then why are you always so nice to him?"

"He's awful but you what? Kill him with kindness?" Poppy agreed. 

"Because, my darling, the best way to deal with people like that is to make sure they know they can't get to you. Anyway, when all's said and done, what's more important, being loving or being right? I was so proud of you when you left him. You knew you deserved better." she assured. "Now, I've got a whole lot of baggage, but when I love something, I love it forever. And I loved your father."

"Even though he treated you like that?"

"Yeah. Now will you say something on behalf of him?"

"I..." Rebecca hesitated. 

"My speech would be he only cared about football, the moment I was thrown out for lies he practically disowned me as well." Poppy admitted. "It has to be you. I can't lie up there." 

"Let us pray. Our Father... ... who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name. ♪ Amazing grace ♪ ♪ How sweet the sound ♪ "The Lord is my shepherd. There is nothing I shall want. Fresh and green are the pastures".

"Now, normally I would have to fib about how well I knew the deceased. But in this case, I did know Paul very well. He came to church every weekend, sitting right over there, paying attention to every single word of the Richmond match he was listening to on his phone." The priest remarked. "But I never felt the need... to chide Paul about this. It was a sign of his passion... for his beloved sport and the commitment he showed to his team. They're the same passion and commitment which he showed both as a husband and a father to his family as well. And now we will hear a eulogy from Paul's eldest daughter, Rebecca." Poppy gave her hand a squeeze as Birdie yawned out the priest boring her to sleep. Birdie snuggled into Poppy's lap playing with the edge of her dress. 

"I don't really know what to say. Um.. Um, my father... was, um... We're no strangers to love. You know the rules... ♪ And so do I ♪ ♪ A full commitment's what I'm thinking of ♪ ♪ You wouldn't get this from any other guy ♪" Rebecca choked out sighing. ♪ I... ♪ 

♪ Just want to tell you how I'm feeling ♪ she looked up seeing her richmond family singing along.

"♪ Try to make you understand ♪" Ted added coming in from the back. Poppy's head turned at his voice. He moved down the aisle to her but stopped in the back behind the last row of people. His gaze stuck on Poppy. 

"♪ Never gonna give you up ♪ ♪ Never gonna let you down ♪

♪ Never gonna run around ♪ ♪ And desert you ♪ ♪ Never gonna make you cry ♪ ♪ Never gonna say... ♪ ♪ Never gonna say goodbye ♪

After the song ended Poppy ran to Ted hugging him tight. 

"I'm sorry I'm late." 

"It's okay." Poppy assured. "I just wanted to hug you all day. I woke up in my childhood bed and being here was just... awful without you." 

"I'm so sorry."

"Can we get out of here?"

"You sure?" 

"They dont need me for the after party."

"Whatever you want." Ted agreed kissing her temple.

After a big feast of just desserts Birdie was snuggled up in bed with all her new stuffed animals and Poppy was draped over Ted holding him close. She hated being apart from him, even just for a day. 

"I want to tell you story about my dad." 

"I would love to hear it." Poppy agreed kissing along his jaw. 

"When I was in fifth or sixth grade, there was this book called Johnny Tremain, and our homework for, like, a month was to read this book. At the end of the month, I hadn't read a lick of it, you know. And we had a test, big test, like, the next day. And the night before, I was anxious as all heck, and I couldn't sleep, and my dad starts getting after me about that. And I start crying. And he's like, "Whoa, buddy. What's wrong? What's wrong?" Ted remarked. "And I tell him what's up. And he says, "Hey, don't worry about it, okay. Just go up to your room, lay your head on your pillow and think about something you're looking forward to". Ted recalled. "So that's what I did. Next morning, I wake up, and he says, "Hey, you ain't gonna ride your bike to school. I'm gonna drive you". And I'm like, "All right". And on the way to school, he talks me through the entire book, like it's a, uh, a bedtime story or something. 'Cause he stayed up all night, the whole night, reading the whole damn thing, 'cause he didn't want his little boy stressed out over some stupid, silly test. And I ended up getting an A."

"Thats a good dad right there." Poppy remarked. She had only found out more shit about her father today that she wished she didnt know but it didnt change anything because he was dead and she wasnt. Holding onto pain didnt help.

"He was a good dad." Ted agreed.  "And I don't think he knew that. I think if he would've known how good he was at stuff he didn't really care about being good at, he... I don't think he would've done what he... And I wish I would've told him. I wish I would've told him more. I was just so angry at him. 'Cause he was always going to work and just out with friends or something like that, and then he was gone. And I knew right then and there that I was never gonna let anybody get by me without understanding they might be hurting inside, you know. 'Cause life, it's hard. It's real hard. And I hate that I wasnt there for you today when you needed me. Because you had a hard day and I should have been right there beside you."

"It's okay-"

"It's not okay, you needed me-"

"You are here now. I need you now and always. But I need now more than I did then. Dont work yourself up about this Ted. Please... I need you now and here you are."