The Adventures of a Dumb Detective and his Wily Mate.

Untitled Part 21

Chapter 21

Agni bathed and changed . He was raging inside. Raging at himself.

'He called out my name and I felt jealous. Stupid! Ridiculous! I need to tell him the truth. This can't go on. But how? How do I even broach it?'

He lay in bed, his body throbbing with need, mind roiling, fighting his desire and his doubts. He pressed into his throbbing erection and stifled a moan.

'I promised to make him suffer but I'm suffering too. I need him so much. I've waited for him for so long.' He squeezed himself, tighter and tighter until pleasure was replaced by pain. And still, he didn't stop. He squeezed until every drop of desire was replaced with pain. Then he turned to his side and lay thinking about each moment of their encounter. Wondering if there was a chance, an opening he'd missed to confess to him, tell him who he really was. He couldn't think of any.

Rudra entered the guestroom and stood looking down at the foot of the bed. A fresh set of pajamas were laid out for him. He grinned and looked up at the ceiling. 'Thank you.' He said to the rafters.

Freshly showered, he lay in bed. It'd been an exhausting day. Full to the brim with surprises. His mind was buzzing with a kaleidoscope of thoughts. No matter what he tried, he couldn't sleep. Thoughts flew past, one after another, a new pattern emerging with every restless turn.

'What is going on between him and Animesh? Why is he so intimate with his adoptive brother? Why is Sunita so intimate with him, for that matter? Is he or has he been sleeping with them? Which one ? Or is it both at different times? OR at the same time?'

He stilled and heaved a sigh. 'Chii Chii. I'm disgusting.'

He sat up and poured himself a glass of water. His head hit the pillow and the questions returned.

'Was Animesh just showing brotherly concern? Or is there something more? But he seems to like only me, right? He's undoubtedly attracted to me. But why are we moving at this tremendous pace? Why can't I control myself ? My willing partner- he called himself. Why am I doubting him? He's too upright to be duplicitous. Why can't I accept the three of them in their face value?'

He got up and drank some more water. And lay back down. 'I said Ani's name right into his mouth. Shameful bastard that I am! Who am I cheating? Agni or Ani? He was justified in his anger. I compared him to someone else. Belittled him. Here I am judging his morals on some flimsy suspicion but I'm far worse than him!'

He lay wide awake, fighting himself, then gave up with a huff and went outside.

It was pitch dark. He stood near the main door and lit a cigarette. In the flash of the match, he noticed Sameer leaning against a pillar further down. 

'Can't sleep?' Sameer asked with a wave, raising his voice above the deafening croaking of the frogs. Rudra nodded as he dragged in a lungful of smoke.

'Me neither. The thought of fatherhood! It seems unreal. For such a long time I'd accepted death as my future prospects. Now all this peace, all this plenty, all this cushiony comfort feels fake. I have waited for so long, this is so longed for, but now I don't feel ready at all!'

Rudra patted his back and said, 'you'll make a very good father. The most important thing a father should have is a sense of responsibility. A trait you have in overabundance. So don't worry.'

Sameer turned to him. 'And what about your worries? Do you still suspect Animesh?'

Rudra chuckled softly and shook his head. 'He had the means, yes. Motive, yes, if money was the motive. Opportunity, probably, if they are in it together. They are prime candidates, so to speak.'