Dancing To Your Tune

Liking You

Akk was in that floaty headspace again. Last time he had felt this relaxed and safe was when Ayan had accidentally barged in his room. But wasn't he alone right now? He would know if he opened his eyes but he wanted to stay in this warmth a bit longer. He felt warm, someone was hugging him, stroking his hair lovingly. Lovingly? Why would anyone do anything with him lovingly? He didn't deserve it, right? But he still wanted to stay longer in this farce. Even if it wasn't true, it felt good to feel warmth of another human.

"Akk, wake up. You should eat something."

"Hm?" Akk shot out of bed.

It was Ayan. In his bed. Looking beautiful. He shook his head. It wasn't the time to be thinking about that.

"You?"

"Yes. Me. Freshen up, I'll make breakfast."

"But-"

"We can talk after you eat something." Ayan went to the kitchen leaving Akk to gape in shock.

Akk looked down at himself and felt his cheeks burn in embarrassment. He was wearing a skirt. Oh god, Ayan must've been disgusted. How could he let this happen again. How did they even end up here? Last night was blurry in his head. He dragged himself to the bathroom to shower and change. When he trudged to the kitchen rather reluctantly if you asked him. He didn't want to face Ayan, he wasn't sure it would end well. But surprisingly, Ayan seemed quite normal for someone who had been avoiding him for last few days. He took a seat at the table loaded with so many dishes. When did Ayan even cook all of this?

"Eat."

"Um.....Why are you here?"

Ayan took his time answering, making sure Akk was eating the food. "I saw you with your parents yesterday."

"Oh."

"I.....I don't want to pry in your personal life. I didn't kno-"

Akk scoffed, "So? Why are you even here?" He didn't mean to say this but his embarrassment and hurt were messing his head. Why did Ayan always see all the ugly parts of him?

"Akk-"

"Are you pitying me? I don't need that." He was hardly in control of his emotions. Ayan hadn't cared about him before so why did he now? Or did he even? It was just pity, right?

"I don't pity you, Akk. Let me explain." Ayan frowned at the turn of conversation.

"You do or why else would you be here. You hate me."

"What?" Ayan asked confused.

"I know you do. I know you asked Mew to change your producer. You are disgusted with me."

"Akk-"

"I know I'm weird and messed up. Me wearing skirt isn't normal at all, I know that. I can understand why you would hate me. I understand that. I really do. Everyone hates me."

Akk was sobbing by then. It all hurt. Everything was hurting. He didn't want to be in pain anymore. Ayan quickly moved towards him but Akk pushed him away.

"Don't. Don't hug me like you care."

"I do. I really do care, Akk."

"No, you're lying. You don't, not anymore."

Ayan pulled him hands back even though they were itching to grab Akk. He hated seeing Akk crying. It made him ache in ways he didn't know was possible. He was still upset about being led on but he couldn't see Akk suffering. He could never hate Akk no matter what. He kneeled beside Akk and took his hands in his.