𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗻𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁𝘀 𝗶 𝘄𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 𝗴𝗶𝘃𝗲

reunion

Dad lets out a throaty laugh, "Yeah, I don't exactly look the same as I did 7 years ago, don't remind me." Dad scratches the back of his neck, and chuckles nervously as he gets up, "Well, are you just going to stand there, or are you going to give me a hug?"

There are so many conflicted feelings in this moment surging through me, but the one that dominates most is the love that I forgot I had for this man. I rush over to him and throw my arms around his neck. The tears start to run when I feel the warmth of my dad's embrace as he pulls me into him. "I'm so mad at you for leaving me." I cry out. Dad holds me tighter and cradles my head.

"And I'm even more mad at myself." His voice cracks through his words, and I can tell he wants to stay strong for me. I look up at him to see his eyes burning with emotion, "I'm sorry, Bailey." he whispers, "I'm sorry I was too scared to stand up and be a man after what happened to me-" He shakes his head, "No, to us."

He pulls me back looking squarely at me and wipes the tears off my cheeks, "But I promise you, I will never leave you again unless life itself decides to tear us apart." The promise that he gives me is genuine; I see it in his eyes that he's truly sorry for what he's done to me. I won't be able to trust him just because he apologized, but this is a good start.

I won't shut him down, I'll forgive him.

It's what I'm best at. "I'm not just going to trust your word for it. It's going to take a while for us to build our relationship, but I believe that you are sorry." I smile, "I missed you dad, and I'm just happy you came back."

He smiles then, "I made such an intelligent daughter. If only I'd stayed with you and did things right the first time." He casts his head down, "I know I can't reverse time, but I can be trustworthy now, I can be a good father." My heart swells with something similar to admiration and joy. "Would you like to come inside and talk for a bit?" I ask.

Dad nods, and I unlock the door to head inside. I prepare Dad and I some hot tea and we sit on the sofa in the living room. He fills me in on where he's been over the past few years. Dad talks about all the countries he has visited and people he has met along the way. He tells me that these trips was his attempt at trying to heal from Mom's death.

My father goes on about the lessons he's learned along the way, "I was running from a past that would forever stay with me. Once I realized my past would never leave me, I stopped running and started to face my reality. My wife died, and there is nothing I can do to change that."

It makes me think about the things I should let go, and the trauma I should allow to heal. Dad knew the person Mom was before she had me, and maybe that person was worth the love he had for her. But my vision of her is different, and I cannot do anything to change that. Talking to Dad made me realize that it's time to let it go. I have memories of her, and I will hold tight to them, but for now on I will allow myself to be happy.

We talk about that for a while and then I ask something that's been on my mind for a while, "Have you met anyone knew?"Dad chokes on the tea he's sipping and places it down on the coaster, wiping the corner of his mouth, "No, I haven't" he says nervously, "Wouldn't you feel weird about it if I did?"

I chuckle and shake my head, "Mom and I weren't exactly that close for me to be upset that you moved on, Dad." Dad looks down but doesn't say a word. "I have been thinking about finding love again, I can't stay alone forever, right?" He looks up at me then, and my heart breaks for him.

I grab dad's hand, "I just want you to be happy. I know you're a good man. I believe that good people deserve good things." I smile, "I want this for you." My words hit a nerve in him, I see the meaning it gives him in his expression. He nods and we talk a little longer about Mom and what we've done in the past few years.