𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗻𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁𝘀 𝗶 𝘄𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 𝗴𝗶𝘃𝗲

forgiveness

When a girl sees the man that gave her the best night in her life fucking another woman right in front in her, it sends them haywire.

I want to get mad. That is what my flesh wants me to do. It makes me angry watching him wanting another woman how he wanted me that night. My mind is telling me to brush it off. That he's doing all of this on purpose to get a reaction out of me.

And that is totally right.

Everybody should know that old saying that goes, follow your heart.

It definitely isn't for realists. In my opinion, I think I should always depend on my mind. My mind won't ever lie or take up for anyone when they are in the wrong. It will always go off of facts.

And it is blatant that Lukas is fucking with my head.

I push my rolling chair back from my desk with my feet.I grab my purse and jacket off of the top of my chair and hop up. My nerves build up anticipating the awkward encounter I'm sure to run into with Lukas. I take a deep breath, preparing to take on all of his sly remarks.

I notice that Lukas' office is peaceful. Way nicer than it was before. I find myself enjoying the nice tranquilty of the area. Lukas is turned to the landscape of uptown Chicago so that I can see only the back of his chair and the brown messy tangles of his hair.

I gaze down, watching the cars pass by and the lights brightening up the city. "Hold on, I'll be finished in a minute." he says acknowledging my presence. Lukas' voice is softer than before. It's like what happened a few hours ago was just a dream.

And maybe the way he's acting should make me feel better about it all. But surprisingly it is only pissing me off more. I guess him having sex with that woman didn't bother him like the way it bothered me. "I won't be riding with you today." I say, pulling the jacket in my hands over my shoulders.

Lukas doesn't turn from the window just yet but still replies to my statement. "If I remember correctly, you agreed that you would ride with me to and from work. To the conditions that you're still working as my personal assistant." he continues, "And from what I understand, you are still my assistant."

I purse my lips. "Well you didn't seem to mind that when you didn't come to pick me up for those past two weeks you disappeared."

Lukas chuckles and turns around to face me. "Look sweetheart." His eyes flit down my bare legs. "I fucked up on that."

I can tell by the lazy grin on his face, and the way his shirt is unbuttoned and his tie is wrapped around his neck that he's out of it. I scan his wrecked desk to find another bottle of alcohol on his desk, beside the bottle is a half full glass of brown liquid.

"Lukas." I say looking at the alcohol, "This isn't funny anymore. None of this is a joke."

Lukas' doesn't become guarded like I expected. Instead, he surprises me when his smile deepens showing off a dimple on the left of his cheek. "I know. I'm all fucked up sweetheart." he says, "I don't think this shit is funny either but this is the only way I can lighten up." he says briskly nodding his head to the bottle of brown liquor on the table.

"I won't be like this for long." he says "I have to get my shit together soon." his fingers come to brush through his hair, "I just don't know how to deal with any of this."

His hands fall, causing the hair to fall back into his face. "And God. The way I treated you today" he changes the subject. He pulls his forehead down to his desk so his arms are under his face, shielding his head from the cool of the table.

"Come here." he says after a few beats. His voice is a little muffled from his mouth being covered by his arms. I walk over hesitantly unsure of what Lukas is about to do. Once Lukas feels my presence he lifts his head and looks at me for a while. "I'm not good at apologizing. I'm sure you've figured that out already."

Lukas reaches into his back pocket and pulls out his wallet, "I want you to take this." He feels around inside of his wallet pulling out a few bills.

"Buy yourself something nice." he adds, holding out the money towards me. I see an one-hundred dollar bill on the top of the stack and it isn't even the end of it. I look at his opened hand, and my eyes trail back up to his face.

I shake my head no. "With all due respect Lukas, I do not want any compensation." Lukas' face turns stoic, showing no emotion except for the tightening of his hand enclosing the money into his fist. "Thank you for offering. You're forgiven."

After a few seconds of silence, Lukas' facial expression turn incredulous. "Why?" he asks.

After a few seconds of thinking I close my mouth. I don't know how to reply. "I just don't want the money." I continue, "It's as simple as that. I mean, I have a job," I say , and my eyes flick forward to look at the ceiling to think some more.

"I have a house, food, and clothes, all the things that I need. Why should I take money from you when I don't need it?"

Lukas' eyes widen "Huh." he says, realizing what I mean. He opens his wallet and places the bills back into their places neatly.

"You know" he begins, "In all of my years of living, I've never had anyone reject money from me." Lukas looks deep in thought.

He grabs the glass of whiskey he has on his desk, and places it to his lips. He takes a long sip, leaning his head back to take in all of the liquid.

When he's done, he sets the glass down and pushes his head to the back of his chair. "You're different, Bailey." he says. Lukas closes his eyes for a while, basking in the Chicago lights. "I like that."

Lukas' eyes are closed, his shoulders loosened, and his lips are parted. His face is pointing to the ceiling. He looks peaceful. Now I feel kind of wrong to have tried to take the alcohol away from him.

But I just couldn't help it, seeing him drinking like that brought back memories of my dad. Of my father who tried to drink all of his pain away. He didn't realize that he was slowly sipping our relationship away as well.

The room is dead silent. So silent that I can hear my own breathing and his as well. "Well" I announce, "I guess I should go ahead and leave." I'm just trying to hurry up and get out of his office.

Lukas' head shoots up and his eyes slightly open. "Where you going in such a rush Bailey?" His voice is husky due to sleepiness. A sharp tingle shoots through me by how my name flows like honey through his lips.

"Home" I say, "It's quite late."

"I'll take you home" he says rising out of his chair, "No need in you spending money on a subway you don't have to spend."

I smile and press my hand to his shoulder pushing him back down into his seat. "You are not driving me home drunkie" I laugh.

"Have you forgotten that you've been drinking?"

Lukas looks deep in thought and after a while he says, "You drive then." Lukas gets out of his chair, "Then you can spend the night at my house, and I'll take you back home in the morning so you can get dressed for work."

"No" I answer, declining his offer in fear of what we might do if I go with him.

Lukas smirks and his eyes relax, "I won't try anything at my place sweetheart." he says, "I promise." he holds out his pinky finger raising it to my hands.

He is really pinky-promising me like a kindergartner. I stare at his finger, growing seemingly aware of all the choices that I don't have. He wiggles the finger in front of me, a smile etched on his face.

I smile back. Fuck, I can't leave him.

I just can't leave him here and let him drive home drunk. I won't let myself leave him. It's best if I just go ahead and drive the car.

"Fine Lukas" I give up. "But we're staying at my house instead." I wrap my pinky finger around his. He smiles when my fingers comes into contact with his skin.

Lukas stands up and reaches into his pocket, "That's alright with me." he replies "Here's the keys." he holds them out to me. I take in a deep breath realizing I'm about to face one of my biggest fears. I reach out and take the keys from his outstretched hand.