Eternal Rot

Stuck on Sinner

Alastor was too polite to frown at his unwelcome guest, but his face paled, his eyebrows quivering behind his glasses as tried again and again to remove the ring on his finger, "So, let me get this sorted." Alastor said, his eyebrow quirked with annoyance as he massaged the bridge of his nose once he gave up, "You're actually Lucifer, ruler of Hell."

"Yep, pretty cool right?" The devil grinned, leaning forward on his hands as he admired the human, "And I am your biggest fan!"

Alastor took off his glasses, simply aghast by the scenario. It felt like an extremely cheesy excerpt of his first book when the devil had taken possession of a mortal's soul, using it as leverage for sinful activity. The scene where the two began to fuck in the human's kitchen... Oh, lord, Alastor shot up out of his chair, beginning to walk into the lounge, as though he could avoid ever going back into the room, and by extension; the entire smut scene altogether. He cleaned his lenses on his shirt, then turned to Lucifer, who had followed him rather obediently, "Why would you bother reading literature from a human? Isn't there better... more dirty... materials made down there?" He pointed towards the floor, avoiding saying the word Hell twice so close together.

"Well, your stories are so enchanting. I had to come meet you after I noticed that you hadn't published anything in awhile." Lucifer shrugged, hands now on his hips as he coyly leaned towards the man, "Ya know, when I came all the way here I didn't think I'd run into such an adorable man! I kinda hoped, but..." He gestured playfully, tongue lulling from his mouth, which made Al shiver, "You're like the whole package. I even got you to make a deal with me without having to pry!"

"A deal... yes... Can I take it back?" Alastor asked in a barely audible tone.

"Nope." Lucifer purred, holding out his hand to the taller man.

Al sighed, taking it despite himself. Lucifer pulled him down to his level, seeming to admire his catch, "I think it would be a shame to end this too easily. Let's enjoy this, h'm?"

Alastor doubted he would enjoy anything that the devil had for him, his smile finally dropping. Lucifer chuckled, pecking his lips quickly before Alastor could pull away. The man shot up straight, hand over his mouth, eyes large as he nearly stumbled backwards, his backside hitting his end table. A candle on his table topped over, and soon his carpet caught fire.

"Now you've done it!" Alastor squeaked in a panic as he stomped the fire out of his expensive carpet, knowing fully that he would be losing the deposit on the rental home now, "Whatever did I do to deserve such frustrations! I couldn't have seen the big cheese of Hell himself coming into my home just because I like to write slutty stories!" The man shouted.

"I think you could use a bit of fire in your life, it suits your devilish mind." Lucifer grinned as he watched the man struggle.

"Oh, dry up! I am in no mood for this today!" Alastor finally sunk to his knees dramatically, grasping his hands together, "Dear God, fucking stike me down. Pretty please. Take the devil with me too, because he's a bitch! A total flat tire!"

"I smell burning!" A voice made Al's body stiffen, turning fast to face the source.

It was his small neighbor, who had just as much trouble as Lucifer did with boundaries. She walked right in, with a big smile on her little pudgy face, her one good eye shining with interest, "Did ya catch the floor on fire Alastor? You didn't even invite me!"

"Nif!" Al squeaked, now sitting on the mark as though it would hide it, "Please don't tell your husband, I'll clean it up!"

"Oh, I wouldn't tell that wet blanket anything!" She giggled, her good eye then looking up at Lucifer's smiling form, "Oh, hello!"