Be Better, Or stay Bitter. Self Love Journey.

Lesson 5: Your, Traumas, Your Responsibility

Travis isn't really a good person. You guys haven't met him and i'm sure you guys can agree. In his eyes hes the bestest person ever. Be aware with yourself.

As said, Travis isn't a good person. But it's not entirely his fault, he had a broken family. I cannot mention more than he came from a broken family, because it's always been a sensitive topic for him and I still respect it till this day. But here's one thing you need to understand. We don't invite traumas and problems in our life, but it's our responsibility to heal and fix ourselves.

You cannot always blame on your family, your traumas, your childhood or your problems. Because at some point you have to put all that behind you and help yourself. If you don't, no one else will do it for you and you'll remain broken forever.

I went back to Travis 4 months later after our breakup, I did it to help him. I talked to him and I tried to guide him to the light. I didn't want to move on with my life with the thought that I didn't help or talk to him about these things. Because sometimes you need someone else to open your eyes and realize what you're doing.

I discussed about this with him for a long hour, but it was useless. He kept saying things like "I have changed, I don't hang out with those people anymore. I don't do this and that anymore blah blah blah." He was lying both to me, and himself.

He had been saying since day 1 that he had changed. When we were friends he said that he used to do many bad things in the past and that he don't do them anymore. He even said it during our relationship and after our breakup. But he has never changed his habits and hes not interested in changing them. Instead of listening to what I had to say, he went on a self defence mode and lied right away about everything.

You can lie to anyone. But if you lie to yourself, you've lost. Lie as much as you want to the world, but please always be honest with yourself. If you can't be honest with yourself, you cannot be honest with anyone in the world, You even stop trusting yourself. Isn't that sad?

I feel like this is why people who cheat, cheats in a relationship. They lack honesty towards everyone including themselves. PS: If someone cheats on you, don't take it personally. There's nothing wrong with you, it's just them having trouble with themselves. How can you expect someone to be loyal to you if they aren't loyal to themselves? Every person who cheats, always has a war inside of them and a weak personality.

I went back to Travis without caring what directions he would choose next, at least I did my part. You can warn a child about fire. But if they still want to touch the dangerous and painful flame, it's their own fault. I was the first and most likely the last person to warn Travis about the fire, but if he still wants to go towards it, then it's his decision.

After our talk, I blocked him from everywhere, I deleted all his photos and I moved on with my life. And I haven't talked nor heard from him ever since.

Heal your traumas, fix yourself, be honest with yourself, strenghten yourself.