Kellard- A Gerard Way and Kellin Quinn fanfiction

I Am Not Afraid

Gerard's P.O.V
I couldn't do this. I wouldn't do this. Some may call me selfish seeing as he had just tried to commit suicide but I had decided I was going to start putting myself first. He was the one that kept saying he didn't know what he wanted, he's the one that's obviously mentally unstable and he's the one that took those pills. When he basically rejected me I didn't do that, so why should I have felt guilty because he did?

After countless amounts of alcohol and hospital trips ( just for them to be thrown back in my face), I had made my decision. Fuck him. We always think people we idolise are going to be the most perfect people and half of the time they're the most fucked up. I couldn't go on worrying about him when I have enough on my plate trying to look after myself. I'd decided to swear off relationships unless it was purely physical and meaningless. I needed to learn how to live on my own and love myself before I could expect someone else to be able to.

Warped tour ended in one month. Until then I would fill my days with rehearsals, performances and drawing to take up the time in between. I would be polite and talk to him when spoken to but other than that I had to act like I'd never met him. Which he can't complain about seen as that's all he's wanted me to do recently.

Keep your head down, get yourself strong.