You're Dead To Me || ᴛʜᴇ ᴏᴜᴛꜱɪᴅᴇʀꜱ

You'll See Me In A Sunset

Ponyboy Curtis...
The sun dipped below the horizon, sinking into the deep blue ocean with a green undertone, the surface glimmered like a trillion diamonds. That's what the ocean is worth. A silky collision of skyburst shades of rose reds, oranges, and yellows paint the sky.

And just as I thought the sight couldn't get any more beautiful, I look to my side and see Johnny. The light blazes down on his pretty tan face. It reflects on his complexion, his dark hair gently sways with the breeze. His eyes meet mine and he gently smiles, the warmth of it transfers to me and I move closer to him as the waves crash in the background.

"Hey, Johnny," I say. "Hey, Ponyboy. It's been a while, " he says lightly. I smile more, "I'm glad you're here. I really missed you, you're my best friend." I say softly.

Johnny's dark doe eyes sparkle with awe. "I wish I could give back to you, Ponyboy. I don't think anyone else would've ran away with me like how you did and stayed by my side like that. You risked it all. You know . . . Darry would've been really mad if he didn't love you so much." He smiles bittersweetly, I feel my body heat up.

"I know, he would've killed me." We laugh. I didn't know how much Darry loved me until I saw him crying in the hospital, I didn't even know he was capable of being vulnerable. I didn't know he could cry like that.

Our laughter dies down, I take deep steady breaths as I shift closer to Johnny on the sand. "This sunset isn't the only thing that's gold." Johnny states, I feel my face flush. "I know," I speak quietly. I fulfilled Johnny's request to stay gold and pure, nothing stays gold.

Nothing stays perfect, the closest we ever get to perfect is the little moments like this. Perfection only lasts for a moment.

Johnny shifts closer, just inches away from my face now. My body tenses, but I let go and relax. I know shades of red spread across my face, like the reds in the sky.

I get closer as he does, leaning my face closer to his as our lips slightly part. We're just a centimeter or so apart now, I can feel his breath on my lips and it's tempting. We get so impossibly close until . . .

My eyes flutter open, I'm wrapped in covers, laying next to Soda. It takes a few moments to realize where I am, how I got here. Oh, right. Then I remember that dream. I sigh and turn on my side, facing Soda. Yeah, perfection can only last a moment. Just a mere second. I would know.

I nearly experienced it.
_____
I miss Johnny, I wish it was me instead of him. I wonder if it were me, if Dally would have the same reaction. No. If I had just sacrificed myself before Johnny could, we would've only lost one greaser, not two. We wouldn't have lost the glue of the gang, Johnnycake.

I get up out of my bed, drag myself to the kitchen and get a mouthful of chocolate cake. Not really caring about what I put in my body. Then I glance to the living room and see Steve. Why's he here? Darry keeps the door unlocked so if anything happens to the gang then they could have a place to crash.

But Steve and Soda have had a conflict recently, they probably made up for it though since he's here now.

"Oh hey, Ponyboy." Steve greets me and I simply nod. That's when Soda comes out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his waist, I go back to the kitchen but I glance back and I can see Steve's eyes trailing toward Soda. Weird.

I go out to the lot and smoke, I realize the sun is setting. It's summer, I guess I woke up late. My sleep schedule hasn't been the best. I'm just glad I don't have to worry about grades right now because almost everyday when I come back from school I'd have to pray that Darry didn't get a call from one of my lousy teachers.

I head back when I realize I'm not doing anything productive, I wanna see Soda. I go back, the door is unlocked of course. The house is silent, which is odd. Our house is never usually this silent, there's always some type of noise or static.

The gang is probably out somewhere. Well, I don't wanna go out again. I'll just stay home and do my own thing. I grab my notepad and scribble some words, literature or whatever. Silly poems that remind me of Johnny. Then I think about Robet Frost's poem. Johnny and I read a poem by him while we were hiding out in that church.