Before Jaeyun arrived :
Heeseung entered the bathroom to take a shower. He looked at his reflection in the mirror. He just wanted to punch the mirror at the moment, both wanting to himself but he Couldn't, he can't cause jaeyun will know it.
He filled the bath tub with warm water. Stripping his clothes off as he drowned himself in the water and sighed as he felt warmth surrounding him. He stared at the ceiling above him with both his hands on either side of the bath tub.
Flashbacks, that's all he can get at the moment. The moments when his family destroyed his whole life. When they abused him and gave him those painful scars on his heart.
A scar by needled on his heart wouldn't have heart this much then those memories and traumas did. They weren't even needles yet those painful memories where a straight up stab on his heart.
He blinked away those tears which he didn't even realised where there to start with. His long pretty lashes getting wet due to the salty water from his eyes.
"Lee heeseung why don't you just die? " The woman shouted on the top of her lungs as she picked up the nearest glass vase and threw it right next to the 13 year old child who was trembling in fear.
"I-im sorry m-om " The boy said but a yelp left his mouth when he received a harsh slap on his face.
"You ruined my life heeseung you ruined it, first my child died because of you YOU KILLED YOUR OWN BROTHER HEESEUNG and then your dad passed away on your fourth birthday " The lady shouted and gave two more slaps to the child who just kept on sniffling and crying, his hands trembling in fear.
"You should die die DIE FUCKING DIE " the lady shouted more loudly as she grabbed the boy's hair harshly and threw him on the ground. "You like affection and touches huh? " The lady said in a creepy voice as she stared at the child who had nothing but fear in his eyes.
"Fine then ji yeong do whatever you want to do with this child " She signalled to heeseung's step father who smirked and grabbed the child by his arms and dragged him harshly
"M-om p-please" The 13 year old could just beg and beg but his begging were never heard.
And that's when the door behind him was shut.
Heeseung gasped loudly as he pulled himself out of the water and looked around, tears falling from his eyes when he got those flashbacks.
The male felt disgusted of himself... Why can't he just die? That's all people want right. Well he has like 99 reasons to die out of 100 but one reason was holding him back.
Jaeyun, and that one sole reason was alone so big for him to go through all this pain and survive.
But that's doesn't mean that he can't hurt himself right? Creating some scars would be okay right ? For heeseung that seemed the best option for now.
He slowly went to the cupboard which had a blade inside a small box well that blade was used by jaeyun to open the shampoo bottle when they are almost finishing up, to take out every portion of them from the bottle.
But heeseung wasn't in his right mind to use it for that. He wanted to eat her use it to cute himself.
And that's what he did.
Heeseung stood their in Disbelief as reality took over him. God what did I did heeseung thought as he stared at the red pool of blood formed by his blood dripping from his wrist.
"How am I gonna face Jaeyun now " Heeseung muttered as he quickly washed his wrist. Even if he felt good and felt that his pain was relived he couldn't help but feel regret and guilty for betraying himself and his boyfriend like that.
it isn't the first time heeseung did this. He did it 1 year ago too when heeseung and jaeyun were still best friends. That day jaeyun planned to surprise the elder by visiting his apartment with some snacks to share but got shocked instead as he saw the elder's wrist filled with red ugly scars.
Heeseung still remembers how hard the younger cried that day while hugging his best friend tightly.
Regret took over heeseung as he quickly wore his clothes and went to kay on his bed. And after fee minutes he was greeted by his boyfriend's presence.
"I'm tired" He could hear the younger say but he still continued his act. Glad he was good at it cause jaeyun didn't even suspect him once.
Heeseung blushed when he heard the clothes rustling next to him. That means that jaeyun was changing his clothes next to him cause he thought the elder was sleeping.
After a few seconds heeseung felt the space next to him getting filled as the younger male tired laid on it. "Is he okay? " Heeseung heard the younger say and soon enough he could feel a hand on his forehead probably checking his temperature.
"Hm he's okay " Jaeyun intertwined their hands together and nuzzled deep in his boyfriend's neck who let out s surprised hm in return.
But heeseung froze when he felt the soft hand of the younger running his hands through the elder's palm
And that's when he felt his boyfriend kiss his wrist, exactly where the scars were
___________________________________________
They are so precious
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Never Let You Go : HEEJAKE
FanfictionHeeseung who had a traumatic past is the partner of sim jaeyun who doesn't have a good family background Though Lee Heeseung was the one to confess first, he was not able to convey his love to his boyfriend Sim Jaeyun who was very understanding per...