Curse Breaker (or how to find answers)

Seeing eye to eye and fumbling with leads - pt.2

It had been a few more days, and it was Wednesday now, when James decided to sit with Sirius outside, in the courtyard. The snow had stopped since the beginning of the afternoon, and now that their classes had ended, Sirius had been spending some time outside a lot more than usual.

James walked to him, and sat next to him on the stone bench. "How is Remus doing?"

Sirius had spent the last two days by Remus' side. He was slowly getting better, even though it seemed this time was taking a bit more time than usual. James had visited him too, of course. He knew Remus was strong and was fighting to get better, even if it wasn't changing the way his body healed. Madam Pomfrey was doing her best to put him back to health. James knew he'd soon feel better; though he worried a lot for his friend. But Sirius seemed to worry even more.

"He's doing better. Madam Pomfrey said he could get out tonight," He said, smiling softly at James, though his smile didn't seem steady.

James smiled in return, with all the warmth he could. "I can't wait for him to—"

"She also said he would probably need the cane for longer than expected," Sirius cut him, looking down at his feet, in the snow. He gulped. "She said his bones have been fragilized with the amount of transformations he's gone through. She said it's a common consequence of..." James stared at him attentively, and Sirius lowered his voice, looking around warily of anyone eavesdropping their conversation. "Lycanthropy." Sadness tinted his words, very lightly, like watercolour.

"Oh," James said, looking up at the sky. He wondered how Remus was taking this information, alone in his infirmary bed.

Hands joined, Sirius kept going. "She said maybe in the future he'll have to always have a cane. She said I needed to let him rest before he came back to the dorm, so she kicked me out..."

"How is Remus feeling about that?"

"He seemed to have expected it. I think he didn't expect it to be so soon, but... he also seemed relieved."

James patted Sirius' back. "I suppose it's strange," James said, his voice sounding lighter than he expected. "I don't feel bad for him. You know him well. You know how Remus doesn't want to be a burden for us."

He felt Sirius' eyes on him, and he kept going.

"I care about him of course. I'm sad that his transformations will never get better. But I'm proud to say we're here for him. We've always been, as much as we could," James looked over at Sirius with a little encouraging smile. "He also has the special help of Madam Pomfrey. I think that's what he needs, more than us pitying him," James paused, holding Sirius' gaze. Then looking at him dead in the eye, his voice as serious as possible, he asked. "Do you look at him, and think he's miserable?"

Several emotions passed in Sirius' eyes. First, James sadly saw his instinct to reply "yes". He saw Sirius' sadness and his empathy, all the concern and tenderness. And then he knew Sirius would think of all the times they'd seen him contain the beast in him, all the times they'd seen him pretend he wasn't hurt, all the times he could have complained and chose to fight and do better than anyone else instead. James smiled when he saw Sirius' determined expression.

"No. He's not," was Sirius' answer.

James smiled more. "Me neither."

Sirius smiled too. His smile was warmer this time.

"You're right. We need to be here for him. It's all that matters."

Sirius looked more alive now, and James was glad he had accomplished his mission.

"We do."

Sirius looked at the sky, with his usual grin, before looking back at James, nudging him with his shoulder. "Thanks mate."