dancing in the stars (ballerina x singer wlw romance)

chapter twenty-seven

WILLOW

Everything has gone still. My heart, my body, my mind, my life. The minute our mouths meet in the middle, every dark and gray color of my life, becomes golden. My eyes drop all the way closed, and there's just the scent of her, the sound of her, the taste of her as she melts into my arms.
Her mouth is so soft, so pretty– I don't know what heaven tastes like but I'm pretty sure this is the closest I've ever been. Summer kisses me like she's been waiting for this and I kiss her like that too. I have been waiting for this. This feeling, everything is new, like I'm learning to speak a new language just with her. My entire body feels like it's burning– maybe I am, maybe I'm burning alive just because of her trembling thumb stroking my jawline, her lips moving against mine so softly, like she's afraid this is a dream. Maybe it is.

I'm kissing Summer Bennett. The professional ballerina, daughter of a music producer and a hockey player, a girl who has more money than the entire city of Toronto. But she's also the Summer Bennett I've laughed and cried with, she's the person that listens to me and helps me whenever I'm about to have a panic attack. She's the Summer who promised everything was going to be alright, the only person in the world who can bring so much peace, comfort and quiet into my life. She is the person who's turning my life upside down in a matter of months.
She's my Summer.
My Summer. My Summer. My Summer.

The words become a chant in my head as we keep kissing like we're afraid to pull away. What's next? Where do I go from here? I don't even like girls– It's just... it's just her. The way she makes me feel, I have never felt it before. There's no way I could try to make sense of why I did this.
Why am I doing this? I wasn't even thinking when I press my mouth on hers. Not about the consequences, not about 'what happens after', not about the fact that I don't do this stuff– I've never kiss a girl before, but I feel myself becoming obsessed with her. Knowing how she tastes like, knowing what is like to kiss her– is going to destroy me.

We kiss for so long that my lungs start to burn and demand more than brief gasps of air. I break apart with my hands still on her cheeks, suddenly aware of how close we are. Our chests are pressed together, one of her hands rest softly in my waist and the other one on my cheek. I don't dare to open my eyes, we're both trying to catch our breath, I feel her warm breath against my lips, they're brushing against mine and I fight hard the urge to pull her into another kiss.

I crack my eyes open a slit and see she still has hers squeezed shut. My heart flutters at her. Her lips are shiny and puffy, her face flushed, and all I want to do is trace my fingers all over her freckles and admire her all night long. No one is allowed to be this pretty.
I don't want to think about it, I don't want her to open her eyes and demand questions– I want– I want more but I can't take it. This was a mistake.
I've never wanted anyone like this before and it can't be her– it just can't. We're from two different worlds.

Summer's breath starts slowing down but mine picks up in panic. I need to get out of here. Is she leaning again? I can't– A loud knock in her door makes us jerk back and practically jump away from each other. Reality comes rushing back like a bucket of ice water poured over both our heads. Summer sits down, her eyes widen. My pulse is beating dangerously fast, it feels like I'm about to pass out. The knocking continues, then a voice comes from the other side of the room.

"Sunny! I'm home! We're going out with the girls, wanna come?" Aurora raises her voice, still knocking on the door.
I can barely hear her over the loud pounding of my heart.

Summer locks her eyes with me. Her eyes so shiny and bright that makes me hurt everywhere. "I– I should go." I say, taking the covers off me and standing up so fast that it makes me dizzy.