dancing in the stars (ballerina x singer wlw romance)

chapter twenty-nine

WILLOW

sums: i promise i'll be there.

"She said she'll be there, stop worrying." Maya smacks my arm and leans to grab her phone from the coffee table. "You don't trust her?"

"Of course I do." the words come out naturally, without any doubt. I do trust her. "I'm just nervous."

"Well, duh." she rolls her eyes. "It's the first time you're performing with her before the event." her lips curve slightly.

I swallow hard, keeping my eyes in the TV in front of us. We're in the middle of October, professor Queens had called every person performing on December, to know where we are. She also said if we're ready, we have to perform it for her.
Summer said she has the whole choreography ready, but she was not excited about this. Told me she wanted to show it to me first but there's no time. Between classes and work, and her dance classes and school– we barely have time to see each other anymore. I've been taking night and longer shifts at Ocean's, since I've realized I'm way too behind with some stuff at school and since we have no food at home. My mother is taking everything away from me.
Summer is also at the studio twelve hours per day, which I told her it's not healthy at all. We talk every day, when we have time, I ask her how her day's going, if she's eaten anything, if she's okay– but it's not the same. I miss her so much it started to hurt.

Five days have passed since we kissed, she never brought it up again, and I haven't either, trying to convince myself that is for the best, even though doesn't feel like that way. I want to make sure if she's okay, if she's taking care of her leg, if she's still limping– and I'm pretty sure she skips a lot of meals. Two days ago I was googling facts of professional ballet dancers and my heart stopped when I click on an article that read 'eating disorders in ballet industry.' I've never read something so carefully, each word ringing in my ear. Apparently, 'people with smaller bodies were favorited by teachers' and a lot of ex-ballerinas have confirmed that the struggle with food starts with their teachers, because they're always comparing each other, always telling them not to eat, pressuring them to go to the gym and some had even go to the police to file a report on violence and harassment. I mean, what the fuck?
After I read it, everything felt wrong and I spent the whole day thinking about it, but then I thought– Summer's moms care too much about her to let her be mistreated like that, they love her, I'm pretty sure they've never raised their voice to any of their children. They're sending her to the most prestigious school on earth, and it's impossible for them to let her daughter in that environment if they know she's not healthy. Right?

Maya waves a hand in my hand, breaking me out of my trance. "I lost you again. Why are you being so weird?"

"What?" I curl my legs underneath me on the small couch.

"Yeah, you've been weird all week. Like spacing out and, I don't know, in another world." she shrugs, leaning her head on the back of the couch. "What's wrong? Do you need to talk?"

I furrow my brows together. "I'm fine, May. Just tired."

"Are you worried about the showcase?" she kicks her feet up on the coffee table.

"A little, yeah." I shrug.

"Well, don't." she chuckles. "You're with the Summer Bennett, the best professional ballerina in Canada, and you're a really great singer. You're going to win."