Silos of Man

Chapter 33 - Piece de Resistance - Part Two

I really don't want to get out of bed and leave this goddess lying beside me, but I'm way too mind-blown and curious about the contents of my satchel, to sleep. Now that Ryann and I are apparently vigilante fugitives from the NWG, and more-or-less under house-arrest, we won't be spending anytime apart, and as much as I relish that thought, I don't want to bring her in on the envelopes yet, because the less she knows of this mess, the safer she is. I am compelled to continue reading the contents of the envelope in my satchel, just alone, and so these very early hours of the morning when she is deeply asleep will likely be my best opportunity.

I hold my breath as I slink out of our surrogate bed. Just a deeper breath-in from her and she returns to her signature dulcet sleeping tones. I want to stay and watch her for a while, but I need to get through the journal notes before she wakes and notices I'm gone. While it wouldn't be the end of the world if she knew about the envelopes, I think it would scare her more and she doesn't need that right now. I want to digest the contents of these notes and then break them down for her in bite-sized pieces. This is my mess that I got her into and so it is my responsibility to see that she gets through it with as little emotional and mental fall-out as possible.

I tip toe to the closet and quietly open the door just enough to extricate the satchel. I then tip toe the bag down the hall to the bathroom. These 'dreamy digs' that Hannah boasted about really do have a luxurious bathroom, so I have plenty of room to spread out the content of this potentially treacherous envelope. I lock the door and am grateful it has a quieter click than the one at home. I feel a homesick pang in my stomach and am worried about how quickly I'm feeling it. I should be enjoying this time away with Ryann, but the reality of our 'vacation' is making me nostalgic for my former, blissfully ignorant life. One that I will now never get back.

Once you've been made aware of corruption within your utopia-disseminating leaders, the disillusionment will never again allow you to fully trust the system. Our world system. Our world system which I love. I know that it's so much easier to be brought into corruption than fight against it, and so if it is left unchecked by efforts like those of Tom's group and their 'lair' - I allow myself a little smirk here – the end of our global utopia will be inevitable. There is no utopia if there is suffering, and there are always exploited people when there is corruption, which inevitably leads to the suffering of those exploited.

I shake off my fear of what truths are to come and pull the envelope from my satchel. The last pile of papers I had been looking at before being intercepted by Ryann was jumbled at the top.

The next set of clipped papers were underneath them.

The first page is dated, January 15/22, and under that is written;

I'm getting really nervous. What if I freeze up there?! I wish Tatyana was here – sitting in my audience. Those eyes would transfix me, pulling my emotional capital to her, and then my automatic-piolet would take over and I'd ace this thing. Keeping my emotions in check without my rock is brutal. Brutal is underlined here.

January 29/22

I'm ready. As ready as I can be. I'm ready to defend this thesis and disseminate Contributism. I know it inside out and can answer any question on it - legal, financial, political, social and even philosophical. Bring it on.

January 31/22

Nailed it! I'm on cloud 9 today!! I didn't just answer their questions, I volleyed others back to them, which they themselves couldn't answer and so I answered for them. I actually had to stop short of embarrassing them. Yesterday was a great day. I got my ticket to Ukraine today so today is even better. I see her in less than a month!