The paradox Reality of Killing

First Snow

"This is your home isn't it? Your parents live here", y/n noticed after looking around for a while. She had never been around this neighborhood, but Bin had known a lot about Tang.

"Mhm", Tang nodded. Then he grabbed the little shovel he had brought with him. "Is it okay if I..."

"Sure, take your time", she smiled and watched him starting to dig a path into the thick blanket of pure white snow. I was the first snow this Dezember. And somehow it felt like a peaceful hug that buried everything that has happened underneath it.

Y/n watched Tang in silence. She wasn't sure what he was feeling right now. Of course he was in pain, she was too. But maybe he also felt this little relief that she was feeling at the moment. Because although life won't be like it has been ever again, still this felt like the beginning of a new chapter. Maybe one with less death in it. Because if things would get better now, Bin haven't had died for nothing.

„I'm done. We can go now", Tang said after over an hour had passed. Y/n was actually surprised that nobody had noticed them yet.

„No we can't. You can, but we can't", she then answered while shaking her head. He looked at her in confusion. „What's that supposed to mean?"

„Tang, I'm going to take a break", she announced. His face looked like he didn't like the news at all. But she had made this decision days ago. „You said it yourself, it's over. At least for a while. You truly should go. Go somewhere warm like Bin said. Take a time out. And if you ever decide to come back you'll be welcome at my... Bins old place. But right now I need to get my own life back on track."

„So this is it?", he looked so sad y/n nearly heard her heart breaking a little. But this was not the time to get weak. So she nodded her head and he finally accepted her decision. In a very gentle movement he placed his hands on both her cheeks and pulled her closer. His lips melted into hers and they stayed like that for several seconds. Then he stepped away and started walking.

"See you", she waved him goodbye till she couldn't see him anymore. Her heart felt heavy. But it was okay. She knew she'd see him again. And she was right.

It took only three month till it knocked on her door. She had stayed in the flat she had shared with Bin.

She had celebrated Christmas and new years with her mom, and started to take Uni serious again in the last couple of weeks. But when she spotted Tang on her doorstep, it felt like nothing had changed at all.

"You're back", she said while checking him from head to toe. Why wasn't he wearing a jacket or long trousers? He looked like a tourist at the beach. It was February...

But when he stepped closer and pulled her into a tight hug there was no thought left. All she felt was peace. "I'm back."