Lost and alone with no hope of finding herself again, April Driscoll attempts to navigate her way through the last two years of college.
{season three - season four}
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Flashes of sound flooded her senses as April sat in the furthest corner of the room, eyes on the blurred outlines of her classmates as they entered the room one by one diligent to start the day. April had been in her head. Her wrists were covered in a litany of new scars - more chains, more pain that she didn't feel. April hated to feel. Freddie made her feel. If she let Freddie in she'd lose herself. They'd come and take her away again. She still felt the leather straps that restrained her made her feel helpless less in control of herself as she had been.
Nothing's wrong with me. Dr Best said that she was better.
April sighed heavily eyes falling closed as she breathed in. Another breath. One more that proved she was still alive. She was still here amongst the living. April wasn't living. April was numb and cold and dead. April was dead. Eyes fluttered open feeling someone sit next to her and Pandora and Naomi met her sight both looking at her oddly. What had they expected? April didn't care as she met the almond ones that plagued her days and nights since she left him on top of Brandon Hill. Freddie had seen her. The real her. It scared her. Freddie made her feel afraid. Freddie made her feel. April didn't want to feel.
"What's the update on that, then?" Naomi asked trying not to snigger at April's obvious on-display feelings for Freddie.
"Sorry?" April asked, eyes moving away from Freddie.
"Naomes is talking about you and Freddie. You know how he proper likes you and how you definitely like him!" Pandora explained quickly with a smile and a wave to Thomas who had arrived back from the Congo not long after Pandora's sleepover - April hadn't had the chance to speak to the African boy yet, not that she wanted to.
"No. He doesn't. He pities me - that's not the same thing." April muttered, elbow resting on her knees as she placed her fist under her chin in thought.
"Come on. You two couldn't be more obvious." Naomi said, with a suggestive nudge.
"What about you and Emily?" April shot back making Naomi fall silent as Effy appeared with Emily.
"Naomi, hi." Emily smiled brightly at her. Naomi flushed and thanked god that the lights suddenly fizzled out. April sighed beside the girl, hand massaging her temple as Doug began his stupid presentation.
"In ancient times before the now. There was an almighty blazing row between two kingdoms tall and proud. How to decide this without blood?" Doug began dramatically.
"Right, settle down everyone..." Harriet said turning on the light, clearly not in the mood for any of Doug's nonsense. "Thank you, Doug, fascinating introduction!"
"No... But I'm not finished!" Doug protested loudly.
