Eternity is cold. // Stray Kids

but baby, he had all my trust.

Seungmin led Felix back to the room he was originally in, injecting him with some kind of drug again.

"That should be enough, right hyung?" Seungmin asks, turning around with a smile on his face. It felt nice to hurt others the way they hurt him. Minho nods, grabbing Seungmin's hand and pulling him out of the room.

"You did good, Seungmin." And if Seungmin only hurt Felix for the praise Minho gave him, the fact Jeongin likes Felix more than him, and the way that Jisung and Hyunjin are so protective over him (that used to be Seungmin. He wants his friends back.) then that was for him to know and for the others to never fucking find out. He shuts the door behind him.

Seungmin smiles at the praise, watching as Minho walks off down the hallway. When Felix first came, Seungmin wanted to protect him, and wanted to make sure he would always be happy in this situation. Now? He absolutely fucking hated him.

Seungmin wanted to see Felix suffer in every way possible. He needed him gone just so he could have everything he wanted. More like needed.

★ ° . *　　☾　°　.　°☆  . *  ●     ¸

"Hyung?" Jeongin calls out and enters the room. He knows that's not something he should be calling Felix, but at this point, he thinks he trusts Felix more than he does Seungmin. Felix would never hurt him the way Seungmin did.

Seungmin said Felix should be waking up anytime soon, so now is as good as any time to be doing this, when Jeongin could make sure Felix wasn't being hurt by anyone.

He hates saying he doesn't trust Seungmin anymore. It stings like a thousand cuts plastered all over his skin.

Felix doesn't respond, still unresponsive on the bed. Jeongin sighs, he wishes they wouldn't do these things anymore. He hated himself for what he did to Felix, for doing that to someone who radiates happiness and innocence. He hoped it wouldn't break Felix.

Jeongin sits on the end of Felix's bed, patiently, waiting for him to wake up.

As he sits there, Jeongin looks up at the sky and watches as the sun slowly disappears behind the clouds. He watches as it casts a golden hue over the room, embracing the freckles on Felix's face.

It reminds him of how innocent Felix looks. Like hot chocolate on a cold winter morning, and Jeongin just wants to bask in it. He doesn't want to think about what's behind the closed door of Felix's room, and he doesn't want to think about Seungmin anymore.

Jeongin watches as the sun continues its leave until it's fully disappeared behind the clouds, and leaves the room engulfed in darkness. He remains there for a while, lost in his thoughts and waiting for Felix to wake up. He thinks he has more to talk about with Felix than he was aware of at first.

Jeongin just hopes he doesn't break him.

Jeongin sits there until a small hand taps his shoulder. He doesn't even remember what time it is, or how long he's been here. He can hear his stomach grumble, reminding him he certainly hasn't eaten dinner yet, and he doesn't care.

"Jeongin?" Felix asks tentatively. Jeongin looks back at him and sighs, leaning back against the wall like he had for hours. Felix sighs, wrapping delicate arms around him.

Jeongin knows that he doesn't deserve it, but the comfort in Felix is something he so desperately needs. It takes everything in him to not cry into Felix's arms. He knows that Felix could and would comfort him, but he doesn't deserve it.

"I'm sorry, Felix," he says at last. Felix sighs, wrapping his arms around Jeongin tighter. Succeeding in pulling him even closer. "I shouldn't be here right now, I don't deserve comfort from you after what I did to you."

Felix groans, draping his entire body over Jeongin as the sun had with the room just a few hours prior. "I know, Jeongin. Just let yourself sit here with me."

Felix doesn't tell him how much he needs comfort from another human, either. Being locked up in that room wasn't good for him. It didn't have the effect that they wanted on him, but he was so deprived of people and comfort it was insane.

He needed to feel the warmth of another human being, and if Jeongin was the one giving it to him then he was going to accept it.

"I love Seungmin," Jeongin whispers, quiet enough to the point where Felix almost doesn't hear it. "I love Seungmin. I love him so much and it hurts, he only wants to hurt me. I know that now."

Felix doesn't say anything, just rubs Jeongin's back in comforting circles. "I would do everything for him, and he wouldn't do the same for me. I'm sorry I hurt you, Felix. You never deserved that. I'm sorry that you're here, I wish you weren't. I wish I could get you out of here because you deserve the absolute world. I would let them all— Seungmin hyung and the older three— if it meant that you would be okay. If it meant that you could get out of here. It's okay because I love them."

Felix tries his hardest to not cry at Jeongin's words. It's something Jooyeon would say, he would always take the blame for others.

"Don't allow someone to treat you poorly just because you love them, Jeongin," Felix tells him. "You deserve to be happy as much as I do. Tell me, what did Seungmin do to you?"

Jeongin cries into Felix's shoulder harder, grasping at the edges of his hair. "I know I shouldn't be crying because I did the same thing to you..."

Felix wishes he could save Jeongin the way he wishes someone would save him. "Seungmin raped me, Felix."

The room is silent, other than Jeongin's sobs that echo throughout the walls.

"I want to kill myself, Felix."

Felix pulls Jeongin into his lap.

"You're going to be okay, Jeongin."

"Will I, hyung?"

Felix wishes he could answer that.