Forever Apart (Johnny Cade) {The Outsiders}

Seven

Johnny and I liked to lay in the lots and watch the stars. I told him stories about my mom and he listened, asking a few questions here and there. I even got Johnny to tell me a few stories about the gang.

With my arms behind my head, I laid on my back with my eyes closed and enjoying the peace and quiet. It only lasted for a few seconds because I heard footsteps coming my way and some lay next to me. I prayed that it was Johnny but no, it was Dally. I loudly sighed when he sat next to me, to show my annoyance. He chose to ignore it and stared in the distance. He lit himself a cigarette, making me roll my eyes and sit up. "What do you want?" I snapped at him.

"A do over." He replied. "It's not easy, man. Leaving behind your life, especially a good one." I chose not to reply. I curled up in a ball and stared into the distance while he smoked his cigarette.

"We were quiet for a long time before he spoke again. "I don't want you to leave." He said. "We're finally together and you're my responsibility, my blood. Don't leave." His voice sounded as if he really didn't want to tell me that, like his ego wouldn't allow him to beg me not to leave. But it was sincere, he didn't want me to leave.

"I won't leave." I sighed. "It's all talk. Plus, I don't wanna leave Johnny just yet." I blurted.

"Yeah, Johnnycake." Dally chuckled, "you bring something out of him."

"So I've been told." I muttered. "He brings something out of me..keeps me real." The more I was around my brother, the more I hated him because I was just like him. The ego, the character, that's why we clashed, that's why I hated him, because I saw me.

"Our parents forgot your fifth birthday." He blurted. "You were..so sad, I couldn't handle it. So I collected as much money as I could and went to buy two chocolate cupcakes. I didn't have enough and they told me to leave..but then this woman asked me what was wrong. I told her that my parents forgot my sisters birthday and I needed to buy her a chocolate cupcake but I didn't have enough money. The woman recognized me, man. She knew I was a Winston, she saw it in my eyes. She bought me two cupcakes and walked with me as I went home. On the walk, I explained to her how rough life was, having parents that were either always passed out on the couch, or never home. She said she knew my mother, and was there in the hospital when you were born. I was able to sneak the cupcakes to our room when I got home, then our mom grabbed my shoulder and screamed at me. She told me not to talk to strangers and I could've gotten kidnapped, not that she'd care, but I could've." I didn't remember this at all. "That night, there were so many strangers in our house because of a party they threw..there were random strangers sleeping in our room, our belongings were broken and torn up. Our parents didn't care man." He huffed his cigarette. "I took you outside and we sat on the sidewalk, curled up in a small blanket. That's when the woman walked past us and asked us what was going on. I explained it all and begged her to take you. She took you in her arms and I dashed away, making sure that you lived a life without me." Why? It was as if Dallas read my mind. "Cuz I was already messed up with the things I seen, man. I wanted you to have a clean, normal, happy life."

"Dal, you were seven." I sniffled.

"Yeah, and for a seven year old to think they're messed up.." he smoked his cigarette. "I got a couple of beatings when they found out you were missing..and then they went about life, not caring. 'One less mouth to feed' they said." I had no idea, I didn't know the full story. And now that I did, now that I knew his side, I could forgive him.

"I still don't understand it..but I see where your heart was." I told him. "You have to earn my trust, Dallas. I'm not gonna come here and suddenly act all brother and sisterly when I literally have maybe three memories of you." I saw the hurt in his eyes as he smoked his cigarette and then turned back to me.