Because I'm Batman!!!

The Deal Part I

Batman's POV
So the afternoon went smooth. I had my Bat Cola with my Batpaper, enjoying a bat of a time. I stayed out of the news since Harley's outburst. I was the top of news. But I enjoyed the peace and quiet. For a while, no crimes would rise since Joker's death. This is the life.
"Master Bruce," Alfred said, entering my Batcave.
"Yes Alfred?" I asked, sounding annoyed.
"Master Grayson and Mistress Gordon are here to see you."
Great. Now my peace time was about to become a tug of war. I placed everything down and placed on a robe.
"Let them in--"
"But I didn't mean to Barbara!"
I guess they let themselves in I guess. What ever happened to knocking? This generation is going straight to hell.
"I just can't live a life with a proposed hero who just killed our lifelong villain," Barbara said.
"Oh, look at yourself!" Dick said. "Do you know what would've happened if he lived longer?"
I bumped into the conversation.
"Lemme guess: Joker would invade personally in the Gordon's life and shoot Barbara in the spine to make her paralyzed forever then she would be my partner called Oracle and someday lead a team called Birds of Prey?"
They all looked stunned.
"Yeah," Grayson said. "What Bruce said!"
Barbara scoffed. She looked so fine and hot. Her red hair was so sparkly and shiny that I didn't know what to say. How beautiful.
"You guys are dramatic!" She called out. "You both should be ashamed."
"Me?" I asked, pointing at myself.
She nodded.
"How?"
"Let's see. You've slept with Harley for so long that it actually killed Joker," she replied.
"That's a lie!" Dick said, pointing at a picture of Jason. "He has always tried to kill Joker."
"Has Jason ever succeeded to kill Joker? Joker would always hop out of the way when he paid attention."
I butted in again. "He wasn't!"
"Right! If you hadn't slept with Harley, he wouldn't have tried to kill you and pay attention."
Grayson started to explain that Joker was shot. It was useless, Dick. SHUT UP!
"I know that but you shot him, Dick! Not Jason. You blocked his chance to kill him. Besides, I don't think he would actually win Joker's death anyway."
I thought about it.
"She does have a point, Dick," I said.
"Why are you siding with her Bruce?" He asked.
"For one, this is my house!" I shouted. "I raised you partially in here and I trained you! Give me respect! Okay?"
He nodded.
"Second of all, this was Jason's 1000th time trying to kill Joker, yet he always fails because of his gun, me, or the Kardashians! Now, I will admit that I need help--"
"Fuck that Bruce! You need rehab!"
I stared at her.
"Sorry."
I continued.
"But if Joker didn't know about me and Harley, he would've dodged the bullet somehow. It always happens."
Barbara smirked at Grayson. Jason was right. Dick is a dick. No wonder Barbara broke up with him.
"Since when did you agree with Barbara on things?" Dick asked.
I thought for a moment.
"Since today."
Then a moment later, Barbara started to cry. She got caught up between her and Dick's argument that she let one out. Barb had went toward the door but was stopped by her ex, or boyfriend, or whatever.
"Barb, wait," he said, before Barb took her arm away from him.
"I'm through with this!" She cried. "I can't be with you!"
Then, she had exit. That was probably the last I saw her that month. Dick was stunned. He officially was single. I patted his back then said...
"You were doomed from the start."
He smacked my hand away then walked away.
"This is still my house!" I shouted, closing my front door.