I still love you (I promise)

Flashback

authors note: Takes place in the context of the fight we got of 6X06 promo video! It's the backstory for this video.

Lucy stood in Angela's living room, shaking with rage. A pain brewed in her heart that rivaled nothing she had ever felt before. It clawed at her soul and chewed her to pieces and she couldn't fight it anymore. "STOP TRYING TO PROTECT ME!" she screamed, her emotion coming out in her volume.

Angela and Lucy had devised a plan. Angela had invited Tim over for dinner, knowing he'd talk to her. He wouldn't be as hell bent about keeping her safe and in the dark on this whole thing. So he'd come, he'd talk, and then Lucy would stand, from her position in the living room where she wouldn't be seen. But he wouldn't talk, he wouldn't risk Angela's family. Meaning that whatever the fuck this was it was BAD. So bad not even Wesley couldn't get involved to help.

And Tim had been so angry and offended, he'd just about stormed out of her house. But he didnt. "What the fuck? Is this an intervention?!"

And so here she stood, begging him to let her in to help him but he was too fucking stubborn and full of pride to let his past demons affect her future. Their future. Poof, gone, up in smoke. Her hands shook as she raised them to her face, wiping away tears.

Angela had long since left under the excuse of putting the kids down to bed, leaving them in privacy, once she knew this was not going to go well.

"You need to tell me what is going on with you, right now." she said, her voice full of so much spite he flinched. An unreadable look on his face. "Or I swear to God I will walk. And I mean it, you choose this bullshit and we are done. I won't chase you forever."

And that broke them both. Lucy hadn't realized that was the truth until she said it aloud, and it even shocked her.

But it was an ultimatum, let me in, or loose me. Choose this mess, or choose me.

His eyes filled with tears as he registered her words, and he opened his mouth to speak, but she knew that look. She knew him so god damn well, he was ingrained into her very soul. She knew that what he was going to say, she didn't want to hear.

So she left before he could break her, furiously wiping tears from her eyes as she turned. She grabbed her car keys from Angela's entry table and opened the door, heart racing as he called out for her. Voice breaking along with both their hearts, "Lucy please," he cried, "baby you need to trust me,"

She shook her head, begging her knees not to give out and leave her falling apart into nothing but bones and an empty shell of a person. Not to empty her soul and leave her defenseless to the "baby"s of the man who had once called her "boot." Lucy turned back, to read his expression, and knew that she was breaking his heart while he broke hers. Holding eye contact with those beautiful blue eyes that held all the depth in the world, she whispered "Last chance,"

"I love you," was all he said back.

Lucy bit down on her lip so that she didn't cry out.
I love you too!
I can't loose you!
Why are you doing this to us!
I will always love you!
Break my heart! it's only yours to break!
is this worth our future?
Instead the gathered the courage to just say "Goodbye Tim," and slam the door behind her.