I still love you (I promise)

Tim

"Alright boot, just a simple traffic stop. I'm not gonna help on this one." Tim said, leaning back in his seat as his rookie climbed out from the passenger seat.

In all fairness, his transfer to Oakland PD hadn't been all bad. Yes, after WitSec he had lost all seniority, and had to climb the ranks again. But within two years in his new dpt he had earned his two stripes and began TO'ing again. It was good, in theory. Despite the pathetic fact that he'd been longing for his ex girlfriend for the past five years. He was almost 40 and what did he have to show for it despite a broken heart.

Well, three technically. He'd spent three years as "John Doe," from butt fuck nowhere doing butt fuck nothing besides pray that his dark past wouldn't get Lucy killed. And missing her. And hating himself. And then, these past two years he'd spent looking for her. It was hard though, as any searches for people from his past would get flagged for breaking wit-sec. And no matter how much it pained him to have lost her, he knew better than to put her in danger. Even if Ray was in jail.

She was better off without him, she probably had a boyfriend or a husband, maybe even a kid. She probably had the future they had planned. He hoped she got her happy ending, and he hoped she didn't spend every day hating him.

"Lincoln 19, mark me code 3 on a traffic infraction on Main and Hait, silver honda accord license plate Delta Bravo Charlie 671 Romeo," His Rookie, Officer Adam Kent said over his shoulder radio. Snapping Tim back to reality. Kent was a good rookie, despite the fact that Tim was basically a rookie TO, he respected his authority. He wasn't a great companion like Lucy was. Nobody was like her. Kent actually reminded him a lot of Jackson, smart, well prepared, and desperate to prove himself.

Stop feeling fucking sorry for yourself Bradford, everything that happened was your own fault.

Kent walked back to the shop or actually, ran, license and registration in hand. "Where's the fire Kent?" he barked.

"This woman's four year old daughter is en route to Oakland Children's via ambulance, seizure. I need to run her papers fast. But I told her I would ask if we could escort her, help get her there with all this traffic."

"Kent, give this lady her papers back, we are not risking her child for a speeding ticket."

"Oh, sorry sir, just running procedure." He looked down at the papers and frowned. "Fuck, she's a cop,"

Tim furrowed his brows, looking over to the paper but Kent was already out the door, running back to the car.
"Ok ma'am we're going to let you off, my TO is going to pull out ahead of you, just stick behind-"

"I know how to attach an escort boot, hurry up your fucking shop," Lucy knew she was being needlessly rude to a stranger who was trying to help her, it wasn't like her, it was the stress. "Please,"

Kent nodded, turning back to his shop, running pace. He hopped into the passenger seat, buckled, and slammed the door behind him. Tim flipped on the lights and sirens, and pulled out in front of the honda. Routine escort. They flew through traffic the next four miles, before Kent let out a chuckle. "What." Tim deadpanned.

"Nothing it's just that uh, that lady talked like you."

"What does that mean?" Tim said, fighting the urge to roll his eyes.

"She called me boot, and called this a shop. I thought that was a you thing,"

"It's an LAPD thing." Tim replied. Realizing they were about halfway to their destination. "You said she's a cop, she probably transferred here. Like I did," It felt weird to talk about his past, especially since he was told to refrain from even acknowledging his life before Oakland.

"Think you'll recognize her?"

"LA is 502 square miles, there are tons of departments. No I won't recognize her." Tim saw the ER bay of the hospital, and pulled up the shop. Steering it around, finding an open parking space. He watched as the silver honda pulled up besides them and the woman stepped out and...

not the woman
not a woman
not any woman
his woman

Lucy stood there, in the emergency bay of the children's hospital. Hair curled and shorter than he'd seen it before, trimmed into a cute mom bob that sat at her shoulders. Tears ran down her face but she looked beautiful. She wore a light yellow floral blouse, one he recognized actually, and a pair of blue jeans. Her shoes were a nice white pair of wedge boots. He sat, frozen in time, inspecting her. The moonstone ring around her finger, the detective badge on her hip. The gun on the other hip. Her white manicure. And, the St.Christopher pendant around her neck. And he noticed that she was thin, too thin. Thin like she'd spent a long time not eating. Not sick skinny, but not like he remembered her. She still looked as beautiful as the day he first met her.

A strange sound escaped him, a mangled mix of a sigh and a sob and a cough. "Ready to go?" Kent said, and Tim snapped back to reality.

"What?"

"I said are you ready to go?"

"Shit, no, i've got to-" He unbuckled, and opened his door, running out behind her as his rookie yelled after him.

"What the hell man?"

Lucy had disappeared through the double doors, and Tim chased after her, he nodded at a security guard. "A detective came in a minute ago." He managed to get out. The guard pointed down a hallway and Tim took off.

He ran down the hallway before he could even think twice, but then he saw her. Crying, talking to a nurse, and then he saw the stretcher. He saw the tiny little girl, her dark brown hair and bright blue eyes. Eyes filled with tears. He saw her tiny hand inside lucy's, he watched as Lucy planted a kiss to the little girl's head, as she whispered something in her ear. It all moved in slo mo.

He registered the color of her eyes, her hair, fuck even the shape of her face. He registered how tiny and scared and helpless she looked. He did the math. Then he saw the little gold necklace around her tiny little neck, the little pendant shaped like a badge. The pendant he had given Lucy for valentine's day five years ago.
It couldn't be
There was no fucking way
Tim literally felt his heart shatter, and then swell.

He stood there like a statue as a bunch of nurses and doctors came rushing out to her, wheeled her into a room. As a nurse went to stop Lucy from following, as Lucy started to argue in a way he knew so well.

And then a stupid, grating, young man yelled out from behind him. "Bradford!"