the things that aren't talked about.

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Why does asking for help feel impossible, like it's something unlawful? They tell you to do something, but they don't know that feeling of not feeling anything. Sitting in your room trying not to let anyone down, but all you want to do is drown. Drown out the noise, the pain, the anger, and the hurt. That feeling of giving someone all you have to get burnt. Finding different ways that are supposed to help you cope, but deep down you're just slowly giving up hope. They tell you it's a part of life, like that makes everything alright. You can't reach out to your friends, because they make you feel like a burden in the end. I remember those nights, sitting there wanting to give up that fight. But as someone who was able to get sober, I don't think I'd do a single one of those nights over. That sounds awful, but i think if my life never got that painful, I'd never be this grateful. Grateful that I'm able to live my life, grateful to be there for the people i care about, and without a single doubt, I'm unapologetically living my best life. I think everyone deserves that feeling, even if it takes a lot of healing. 

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