Dangerous Life Ahead

42 : || Her Slow Acceptance ||

The dark night sky was replaced by the blue colour with those patches of clouds spread across the horizon.

While Panchali heaved a heavy sigh, as her mind couldn't concentrate on her work.

She hated how she was slowly getting distracted by the recent happenings of her life. The one who always had her concentration only in her work, seemed to be disoriented on it.

Whatever Krishna said earlier on the previous day, seemed to not leaving her mind.

However the topic was related to those five men, who all of a sudden without their awareness made their way to her mind and consciousness, not leaving her a single time, alone with her own thoughts.

The way their determined looks lingered in her mind, the way Yudhisthir's resolved decision on not remarrying and Krishna's words regarding their oath, revolved in her head like a broken record.

Panchali pressed a certain pressure point on the side of her head, to reduce the pain.

She lowered the laptop screen and kept her arms over the table, clutching her head.

With her eyes closed, her vision showed the amused smiling face of Yudhisthir, the loud laughter of Bheem, Arjun's manly chuckle, Nakul's face breaking huge grin, and Sahdev's shy smile.

This time she wasn't irritated, or frustrated by their vision. She gulped as a certain restlessness setted on her heart.

Fear.

A certain fear clutched her soul. They were too pure to get entangle with her dark world.

She wanted to hurt them. She wanted to distance herself from them. Because, she wanted them to be happy in their life, that's the sole reason she wanted them to re-marry.

She didn't want them to mess with her life. She didn't want them to meddle with the darkness she was surrounded.

She was scared, this time. Not because of herself, but for them who resolved to be with her till eternity.

But how could she let them do that, when she knew that she wasn't herself aware of how much time left for her in the world.

Slowly, and steadily she was failing to protect the hard shell around her. And when the shell would break, she would be left with nothing but millions of broken pieces, while staying alive may become difficult for her by then.

Somewhere, Panchali knew that she was losing herself in the process. But she just couldn't come to let her pure husbands be a part of her dirty dark past.

They were the most pure soul she had ever encountered in her life, and God forbid if something happened to them because of her, she would never be able to forgive herself.

Panchali opened her eyes to meet the darkness in her study cabin. Though it was post lunch, with the broad daylight outside, she pulled the curtains, giving a complete access to the Darkness to prevail.

While the chilled temperature inside the cabin didn't have any effect on her.

"Malini." Panchali called her personal trusted handmaiden, who was apparently outside the study, cleaning some showpieces.

"Pranipaat Yuvrani." Malini was greeted by the usual darkness and chilled temperature.

However Panchali sighed heavily knowing what to do next, to confirm and get answers for her questions.

***

The sharpening of arrows was the only sound in the chamber of the Crown Prince, which was occupied by all his brothers.