What Happens In The Dark

CHAPTER 40

"Everything ok babe?" Maya asks snapping Carina out of whatever day dream she is locked in. They are sitting on the couch of their apartment watching a movie and cuddled up together after a long day at work for both of them.

Carina shakes her head slightly "huh?" She asks, smiling as she looks at Maya.

Maya sniggers "I asked if you were ok? You look seriously deep in thought."

"Oh, yeah... I'm fine..." She says unconvincingly.

Maya tilts her head to regard her wife "babe, you know you can talk to me about anything right?" She says gently wanting to make sure her wife is ok but at the same time give her space and not push her to talk.

"Si, I do...I just. It's..." She trails off huffing. "I think maybe it's too soon..."

Maya frowns in confusion "too soon? For what exactly? We are literally married... I think we are solid in our relationship and the speed of things?"

Carina smirks slightly "I am well aware we are married bambina, calling you my wife has been the happiest 3 months of my life. It's not that... It's, well. You remember all the stuff we talked about last year on vacation?" Carina says vaguely.

Maya nods "of course. We talked about a lot... so is there something specific you're thinking ab-" Maya stops eyes going wide, seemingly having understood what exactly it is her wife has on her mind.

Carina looks down, thinking that Maya's reaction - the quiet and wide eyed look she is sporting - suggests she thinks it is too soon.

"Hey, what's happening here?" Maya asks using her finger to tilt Carina's head up, the look on her face breaks Maya's heart a little, a sadness she hasn't seen for a long time.

Carina quickly shakes her head and plasters a smile on her face, "sorry, I know it's too soon, it is. Ignore me, I just get in my head sometimes and then it's heard to stop." She whispers.

Maya smiles "ok, firstly I wanna make sure we are on the same page here...We are talking about kids right?" Carina nods.

"Ok and you think you're getting to a point you wanna reopen that conversation? Maybe in a less hypothetical way?" Maya gently suggests.

Again Carina just nods in lieu of a verbal response, Maya reaches out and strokes her cheek softly "ok, so let's talk about it."

Carina looks at her wide eyed. "Really?" She asks surprised.

Maya smiles, leaning in to drop a kiss on Carina's lips "really" She repeats. "I meant everything I said to you when we talked about it, but that was a very hypothetical discussion and things were different then, in terms of where we were. So if you want to talk about it, then let's do that." Maya says smiling.

"I love you Maya DeLuca-Bishop." Carina whispers, leaning in to kiss her wife softly.

Maya kisses her back before whispering out "I love you too Carina DeLuca-Bishop."

"Ok - so where should we start?" Carina asks.

Maya shrugs "how about you tell me what you have been thinking and how you are feeling? Seems a good place to start." Carina nods in agreement.

"Ok well I guess since just after we got married it's been creeping into my thoughts regularly. I mean in a linear way like that's the next step, the next thing to work to... But not in a bad way... I just... I mean-" Carina struggles with her words, so Maya interrupts.

"I know what you mean, we talked about moving in, marriage and babies, in that order, the first two we've now done so that leaves the babies topic." Maya smiles.