Past and Present

12

Just a short update!

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TIME JUMP: MINNESOTA, Sept 2019

"That's it, Schuyler! Push!" The OB encourages me as I hold on tight to Madeleine's hands, screaming my lungs out while pushing for the baby to finally come out.

"AHHH!! I FUCKING HATE THIS, I WILL KILL CHARLES WHEN I SEE HIM!!" I scream in pain as I push. I know Madeleine must be writhing in pain because I can feel that my nails are digging her palm already.

I heard Madeleine laughed a little, "as if. Kill him with love and kindness probably." I glared at her as I hear my OB talk, "Alright, Schuyler. I need you to push one last time, okay? Just breathe then push!"

I scream as I push for one last time, I'm already so drained. I've been in labor for 14 hours now, if this baby doesn't come up soon I will literally ask my OB to just cut me open and pull the baby out.

I keep pushing and pushing and screaming until I heard my OB, "baby out!" Immediately I heard my baby cry and I just plopped back down on the bed, energy drained out of me. Tears are falling as I listen to my baby's first cry.

I'm a mother.

Madeleine handed the baby girl to me. Although I'm weak, I gather myself up and carried my baby in my arms, I can't help but cry and smile at the same time as I look at her. I'm going to raise you as much as I can my baby.

I smiled at her as I caress her cheek, "Je t'élèverai dans l'amour, la gentillesse et le bonheur. Je te raconterai des histoires sur ton père, même s'il ne te connaît pas encore. [I will raise you in love, kindness, and happiness. I will tell you stories about your father, even if he doesn't know you yet.]" I whispered to her.

After almost 15 minutes, they had to take Addison from me and bring her to the NICU for further tests and so that I can finally rest. Madeleine wanted to stay with me but I just told her off and just fish for other cases in the ER; I was deadbeat tired anyway, even though I want to, I can't mutter enough energy to keep up with a conversation with her. I just want to rest. I was finally drifting to sleep when I heard my phone ringing.

I opened my eyes again to grab my phone and answer the call, it was Max. Madeleine has probably popped the news to them already, I mean I would but I was planning on telling them tomorrow after the qualifying race for the grand prix. I answered the call and as expected, it wasn't just Max, it's both of them.

"Please tell me you're not in the paddock hiding somewhere." I anxiously asked them when I can hear noises in the background.

Both men chuckled and shook their heads, "no, we're in Lando's driver room, we just finished post-practice interviews." Max explained.

I raised an eyebrow at them, "tell me if rumors around you two starting circling the paddock." I laughed at them.

Max and Lando asked me how it all went. So I explained to them how long was I in labor and every in between to the point that they felt bad they couldn't be here in the hospital with me. Which I told them that it was okay, they are needed by their teams first to perform well. It's race week after all. I tried my best to catch up with everything F1 but being pregnant and a surgical intern at the same time is hard as it is already.

"Has Toto and Susie called you yet?" Max asks again, I shook my head and tried to smile, "I was planning on telling all of you tomorrow after I rest. But you both muppets have other things planned." I laughed softly.

"So what's her name?" Lando asks.

I smiled at them, "Addison Montgomery Wolff"; I named her after one of the greatest cardio thoracic surgeons known. She has spearheaded a lot of innovations and has continued providing pro bono surgeries to kids in need; no matter what your background, race, or culture. As long as you need surgery and she can give it. She will. And I wanna be like her someday; she's one of the reasons why I decided to take up surgery. Because if it was up to my dad, I would be taking up business instead.

"You named her after your inspiration for taking up med." Lando explained and I nodded at him, "Now that she's out in the world, she's my inspiration now to do better and be better with my life." I told them.

"You are going to be a great mother, Sky. We all know that." He added again and I just smiled at him, although I am pretty scared.

I made this decision on my own. I am going to raise Addison without her father.

"By the Charles, was asked by some of the journalists earlier." Max suddenly said, I looked at him confused as to why F1 journalists would suddenly ask an F1 driver about their personal life.

Something must have happened.

Thankfully, Max took my confused face as a sign for him to continue talking, "He had a terrible start this season and some journalists think that it might be because of your sudden absence from the Formula 1 races and Toto's silence about you doesn't help Charles' case at all."

I tense up a little. It's Charles' first season with Ferrari and he's tanking it already. This isn't what I wanted in the first place; "I took myself out of his life so he can focus to become a champion under Ferrari and now you're telling me he's tanking it?" I asked followed by a sigh as I massage my temples.

"Just give him a call, Sky. He just wants to know what happened." Max added.

Lando nodded in agreement, "yeah, you basically broke up with him by fleeing without telling him and he wasn't even aware about that."

I am hearing what my friends are telling me, but I just can't risk it. I mean I still love Charles, but that won't be enough if he founds out I was pregnant of his child all this time and he suddenly takes a pause in his F1 career for me. I am not that selfish. We both have big dreams to catch and no one between us could actually take a pause in catching it. It's like both of us has this stopwatch running all throughout our lives. Neither one of us dares to hit stop on that watch to take a step back.

But what my best friends didn't know was that I wrote Charles a proper break up letter before I went here in the US.

"I broke up with him properly." I told them which surprised both men, "I wrote this sappy letter for him and I asked my dad to give it to him."

After almost 30 minutes of catching up, Max and Lando finally ended the call to let me rest. They also told me that they'll be visiting me once the double header grand prix is done; so yeah, I guess something to look forward to; because once the OB clears me and my baby, i'll be in home. For two months. On maternity leave. Ugh, other than caring for my baby what else am I going to do for two months. But before I could drift off to sleep again, my phone pinged.

Charles: Sky, why can't we talk about this? You really expect me to just accept your break up letter and move on? Fine then. I'm giving you until the end of the season to contact me. If still no reply from you. I'll start moving on and try to forget you.

I sighed as I read Charles' text. If that's what will make you re-focus to your career again, Charles.  I'm debating whether or not I should call him, but I know full well that once I hear his voice. I would break down and I might end up spilling everything to him. So everything I've done so far would be useless.

So I decided to do what was best. I blocked his number and unfollowed him in all his socials. After doing so, I put my phone on my beside table and finally rest.

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A/N: FP1 later tonight so I'm giving a double update. I wish the upgrades would do great for Lando and Oscar!