Past and Present

13

I'm still over the moon for Lando's epic win in Miami T_T I literally cried!!

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TRIGGER WARNING: MENTION OF SEXUAL ASSAULT AND BLOOD

TIME JUMP: MINNESOTA, 2020

It was a hard two straight days for me at the hospital. It was a busy day at the hospital - I was on my ER rotation and the ER is always chaotic, but one case stood out and it is the most heart-wrenching case I've ever taken since I started here at Mayo. I only get to go home today since I was the intern on-call yesterday and instead of going home for the night, I just stayed at the hospital. Thankfully, Lando arrived yesterday so Madeleine doesn't need to be helping Dorota as much around the house. I am already on my way home when I received a twitch notification, Lando's streaming with his friends.

I remembered that time I just gave birth to Addison and Lando has already established his Twitch channel and content channel in YouTube. We had to soundproof Lando's room because Addison's room is next to him and whenever he's streaming, he gets a little excited sometimes and just cackles and shouts at the top of his lungs. I almost kicked him out of the house just because of it.

As soon as I enter the house, I was greeted by Dorota who's feeding my daughter. I smiled as soon as I saw my daughter's sparkly emerald green eyes, like his father.

"Ahhhhh-- my baby girl!" I coo as I pick her up from her jump seat and just hugs her tight as I peck her cheek. Her giggles somehow melt the heaviness of my two days in the hospital.

"I made dinner." Dorota declares as she looks at me smiling.

I shook my head, "I don't have the appetite for dinner tonight, Dorota. But thanks, i'll just eat what you cooked at the hospital tomorrow." I tried my best to smile and not to look exhausted at all.

But Dorota sees right through me, "Rest up, Sky; you look exhausted. I'll take care of Addison, you don't have to worry." I mouthed 'thank you' at her as I put Addison back in her seat.

I decided not to bother Lando first and head straight to the bathroom instead to take a long relaxing bath. I prepare the tub and throws a bath bomb in it as well; I massage my temples as an impeding headache seeps through me. Must be the amount of coffee I ingested the past two days; I yawn and sniffed as I turn off the water and finally get in it to just relax and watch Lando's stream.

He looks cozy in his stream. He's wearing a chunky beanie and a huge hoodie, perfect for the winter season here in Minnesota. F1 season ended a week ago, but Lando had to stay in the UK for the McLaren briefing and needed to sort everything out before their winter shutdown. I was actually not expecting for Lando to really fulfill what he told me last year. But hey, having him every off-season is great. I just wish it could be Charles visiting me. But obviously that will never happen since I was being a jerk and left him.

Lando's playing Warzone with some of his friends that I recognize. I sigh heavily wishing the water to drown the memories of the past two days in the hospital. I sometimes wonder if being a surgeon is even worth it, heck, I wonder if being a Doctor in the first place is even the right choice for me. I know I have my parents who will give me their full support for whatever career I take, but still, it makes me wonder those what ifs.

What if I just listened to my dad and took up business instead? I wouldn't be feeling this much guilt and exhaustion over two people I tried saving today.