My mom and dad are splitting up. They say that it's complicated, but I know they are splitting up because of Charlie's plan to get rid of dad number 2. I helped on that evil plan to get my dad to move out because everyone hates his mustache. I mean come on he looks like Hitler 110%. I'm surprised someone hasn't called the cops on him yet I mean come on people do it already please.
My old house is small to start with and now we are moving to a trailer in a small dusty area. The perfect place to start fires with all of the wooden horses my mom buys me. I have like 6 boxes full of the same stupid, ugly, brown horses. I can't wait to see the look on my mom's face when they are burning.
Charlie promises that I can help get rid of dad number 3. In a way I kind of feel bad for my mom, but then I remember all of those horses she bought for me. That witch.
"Dick! Get out of the house we are leaving!" Yelled his mom.
Great she's forcing me to leave now. How wonderful that she took my advise to stay here. Not. Anyways I will go because in this house we have no neighbors and I want to meet some girls.
"Coming," I yelled back to my mom in a unpleasant tone.
Goodbye dirty floor. Goodbye broken fridge. And Goodbye to the place where Hitler once slept. I hate that guy. I think I would rather have the real Hitler dating my mother than that creepy old man that I call my father. Which he is but still.
I walked out of that house almost tripping on a broken floor bord. Twice. That sneaky house always trying to hurt me.
"DICK!GET IN THE CAR!" My mom yelled again.
I could see Charlie in the back of the van laughing at how frustrated mom was so I laughed too. It seems that I look up to my brother way too much, but most of the things he says helps me.
"DICK! IF I HAVE TO YELL ONE MORE TIME! UGHHH!" Screamed my mom.
I ran to the van not wanting to get a beating and opened the door to sit in the back next to Duck reading a book.
The drive was long and boring, but we made it to the "crappiest house" I've ever seen. I thought the drive was worth it until I walked into that house.
Right away that witch I call mom says that Charlie, Duck, and I have to share a room because she needs a room to herself. More like a room for her and dad number 3 if she ever finds someone to be our next victim.
I hope there is a hot girl somewhere around here or in my new school Suck It.
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His Life Though
HumorThis story is about a kid named Dick Sharted who is a new kid at Suck It Middle School. His lifestyle is different from other people.. but he surly enjoys it. Read this to learn how Dick's life is "perfect"
