yours, truly | lord tewksbury

chapter ten: a chair means more than one might think

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*!!Chapter Ten: A Chair Means More Than One Might Think!!*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

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The silence was soul-crushing. Enola had excused herself to contact the authorities and taken Tewkesburys grandmother out of the room, leaving Annalise and Tewkesbury alone, standing across from one another as the weight of Annalise's lies weighed heavy on them both.

"Tewkesbury-"

"Just don't. Anya- Oh sorry. I mean Lady Annalise. Gods, you're such a liar!" Tekwebsury spat out as he sat on a bench in the hallway, shaking his head before putting it in his hands. "You know, I really thought- it doesn't even matter. I don't even know you!"

"It does matter! Please Tewkes, let me explain myself-"

"Don't call me that! You don't get to call me that anymore. Besides, how could you possibly defend this?" He asked incredulously.

"Look, I never meant for it to go this far. You have to believe me. When I pulled up at the Manor all those months ago, I didn't want to meet you let alone marry you. And then you became this enigma that was recklessly running away and I thought, he can't be that bad? What's one last adventure before I'm shackled down. I never meant for any of this to happen." Annalise panted as she tried to explain her actions.

"Then I met you. And you were and are this kind, pure, enigmatic soul and I just had to know you. I had to get to see the real you. And suddenly I was spinning a lie that was rapidly beginning to grow and I knew if you knew I was to be your wife, you'd run away again and I selfishly couldn't let that happen."

"For once, I was Anya. No lady, no expectations, nothing. I was simply a girl on an adventure with a boy she was growing to-" She paused, debating on telling him the whole truth before shaking her head. No more lies.

"The boy you were growing to what?" Tewkesbury asked as his heart pounded in his head, so loud he was concerned he wouldn't hear her answer.

"The boy I was growing to love." Annalise whispered, the words stretching out in between them and hitting Tewkesbury harder than the bullet had. She loved him. How could she love him yet lie so easily? His heart stung as he battled his own feelings, the love he felt for her and the betrayal that coursed through his veins.

The silence was killing her. Annalise had just told him she loved him and he was staring back at her with an empty look on his face and Annalise was sure that nothing could hurt more.

"I love you Tewkesbury. And I am sorry. I knew that if you knew I was your betrothed you'd hate me, yet in lying to you, you hate me all the same. Words cannot even begin to express my guilt. I know I should not have ever lied to you about who I am. But I didn't want you to think I was a crazed lady after her betrothed. I simply wanted to meet the man who was crazy enough to run away and selfishly I wanted an adventure." Annalise laughed, humorlessly and she repeated herself. 

"Admittedly I got more of an adventure than I had planned. I was expecting a train ride, maybe a new friend, not life or death and conspiracies. I want you to know that I am the person you met, the person you knew. All that is different is my name and even that isn't entirely a lie. My brother calls me Anya. Society calls me Lady Annalise. I wanted you to be someone that knew Anya."

Tewkesbury bit his tongue, not trusting himself. He knew that he could open his arms and she'd be in them in an instant and the world would feel whole again. It's what he wanted. But she lied. She hurt him. More than the assassin or his grandmother ever had. And there had to be consequences. How could they be together- hell how could they be friends even- if they didn't trust one another?