A New Beginning

I'm Not Dead

(First Grade)
I show up to school,
Bag on my back.
I find a group of friends.
We start playing tag.

Everything is good.
Everything is great.
I even kinda feel like
The happiest kid in the state.

It's now the third grade.
I meet Auntie Flow.
I go up to the teacher and say,
"Miss, I need to go."

She just crosses her arms.
She won't let me leave.
I sit back in the chair
And feel me bleed, bleed, bleed.

And when I stand up,
My chair is red.
The kids just keep staring,
And I wish I was dead.

Fast forward to first kiss.
I'm in seventh grade.
I didn't know it then,
But I was getting played.

There was this other girl,
I won't say her name.
We were polyamorous,
But was it just a game?

A little while passes.
She wanted to set me up
With the other girl we liked.
I ended up getting dumped.

Freshman year rolls around.
I have a nice friend group.
I have a nice boyfriend.
I even have a Girl Scout troop.

Well, as it turns out,
My boyfriend was a druggie.
Also, all he wanted
Was to take away my virginity.

Sophomore year.
Things start to collapse.
My friends are growing distant.
I start to relapse.

Cuts grow on my arms.
I feel like shit.
I finally know
My friends and I need to split.

I decide to look on TikTok,
And what do I see?
My friends are posting videos,
And some are about me.

As I watch and watch,
I start to feel sick.
They just talk shit about me.
It hits me like a brick.

And now I'm here,
Laying in bed.
I'm going through a lot,
But hey, at least I'm not dead.