Welcome Home Transcripts (found on the actual website)

HAPPY HAUNTING TO BOO AND YOURS

NARRATOR: What a beautiful day in Home, isn't it, neighbor? Just like every day before today and every day after. But something about today is a little different. Our Sally Starlet might describe it as a spine tingling, bone chilling, and hair-raising sort of day! The sort of day her dear friend Poppy Partridge always dreaded, even as she helped prepare for the celebration.

Yes, that's right! It was Sally's favorite holiday- The Macabre Menagerie of Monstrous Mischief-Making! A monumental mouthful, if you ask me. But we've had our time talking, let's peer into Poppy's window to hear about it for ourselves.

SALLY: ...Darling, you've produced such a dazzling and decadent display— Thank you again for letting me use your not-so-humble abode for my Macabre Menagerie of Monstrous Mischief-Making festivities.

NARRATOR: Sally carefully placed down the assorted treats on the table- Some even looked like our neighbors! They ought to make one for the Narrator, though...

POPPY: Why of course, dear! It's so lovely to help you with your erm, well— Macabre— er, oh my—

SALLY: My Macabre Menagerie of Monstrous Mischief-Making, Poppy!

POPPY: ...R-Right. [Said very quietly, mostly to herself.] ...Does it have to be monstrous...?

SALLY: [Insistently] Poppy! Horror is the backbone of the Macabre Menagerie of Monstrous Mischief-Making! It is integral to what makes thespians, such as myself, able to convey true terror on stage! Everyone in Home simply must experience such a sensation for themselves! So today, everyone will be adorning elaborate ensembles outside of their repetitious apparel and become symbols of pure horror!- [Sally stops her theatrical presentation to return to her less passionate speech.] This will surely help them move into stardom as quickly as yours truly!

POPPY: Oh... But you're dressed as a clown-

NARRATOR: Sally was dressed like a clown.

SALLY: If everyone is going as something they are not, then I must do so in turn! A director does not leave her actors to fend for themselves! So I arrived... As Pedrolino-

NARRATOR: Pedrolino, for those of you who don't know, is from the commedia dell'arte-

SALLY: [Scoffing] Oh please, dear narrator! Of course they have!

NARRATOR: Of course. Poppy bristled her feather and sighed gently.

POPPY: [She sighs gently.] ...I-I'm not quite sure I see the appeal, but... I suppose—

SALLY: Then look with your fantastic feathered soul, Poppy! There is more to understanding horror than sight alone!

POPPY: [She takes a pause. There's an air of worried skepticism in her tone.] ...More than sight alone?

SALLY: [As Sally rambles off the list, Poppy begins making fretful sounds] Why of course! A foul stench... A chill down your spine... A sour taste in your mouth... An unexpected knock at your door—

[A knocking at the door can be heard, followed by a worried squawk from POPPY.]

NARRATOR: Oh- That scared me too!

SALLY: Oh— That must be our esteemed guests! I'll get it!

NARRATOR: As Poppy returned to fretting and fawning, Sally walked over to the front door to let in the guests. When she opened the door it revealed... Why, none other than our good friends Wally Darling and Barnaby B. Beagle! Wally was dressed in a devilish outfit, while Barnaby was dressed as... As a werewolf!

BARNABY: That's were-beagle to you, pal!

SALLY: [She opens the door, an extra dramatic flair to her voice.] Welcome one and all! [She notices who is at the door.] Speak of the devil...