"Hi."
"Hi."
"I broke up with her."
"OMFG YOU DID?!?!? YOU STUPID IDIOT YOU'RE GOING TO BE SINGLE FOR THE REST OF ETERNITY."
"Somehow I don't agree with you. But then again, I never do."
"OMG ARE YOU LIKE A PLAYER?!?! FUCKBOY ALERT! FUCKBOY ALERTTTTTTTT!!!!!! CAUTION! BEWARE! A FUCKBOY IS ON THE PROWL!"
"No I'm-"
"WE HAVE A RAPIST IN LINCOLN PARK, HE'S CLIMBING IN YOUR WINDOWS, HE'S SNATCHING YO' PEOPLE UP, TRYIN' TO RAPE EM SO YOU NEED TA HIDE YO KIDS, HIDE YO WIFE, AND HIDE YO HUSBAND BECAUSE THEY RAPIN' EVERYBODY AROUND HERE."
"I can't even relatively relate to that. I'm not a rapist, nor am I a-"
"WE GOT YO T-SHIRT, YOU DONE LEFT FINGERPRINTS AND ALL, YOU ARE SO DUMB, YOU ARE REALLY DUMB, FOR REAL."
"I told you, I'm not a rapist, nor am I a-"
"YOU DON'T HAVE TO COME AND CONFESS THAT YOU DID IT, WE LOOKIN FOR YOU. WE GON FIND YOU, I'M LETTIN YOU KNOW NOW, SO YOU CAN RUN AND TELL THAT, HOMEBOY."
"I AM NOT A RAPIST! NOR AM I A FUCKBOY! WHY CAN'T YOU UNDERSTAND THAT? DON'T YOU EVER LISTEN TO ANYONE?!?!?"
"As a matter of fact, no I don't. Hah, I don't think I ever thought about it. I'm keeping my eyes on you, fuckboy. I have my repellant ready."
"I'M NOT A-"
"That's what they all say. BYE, FUCKBOY." *hangs up*
"She's one spontaneous being."
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If you guys didn't understand the reference, watch the video linked to this chapter! THE WHOLE THING.
Sincerely, heartened
YOU ARE READING
Just A Friend
Historia Corta"So what are you to me?" "Someone you know in another dimension, time, life-" "Wait, what?" "Just a friend." ... BEWARE: Full of cringey humor. Ongoing editing. Expect face palming and laughter. You have been warned.
